Poems upon several occasions

The Poet in this Satyr first brings in Crispinus, whom he had a Lash at in his first Satyr, and whom he promises here not to be forgetful of for the future. He exposes his monstrous Prodigality and Luxury in giving the Price of an Estate for a Barbel: and from thence takes Occasion to introduce the principal Subject, and true Design of this Satyr, which is grounded upon a ridiculous Story of a Turbut presented to Domitian, of so vast a Bigness, that all the Emperor's Scullery had not a Dish large enough to hold it: Upon which the Senate in all haste is summon'd, to consult in this Exigency, what is fittest to be done. The Poet gives us a Particular of the Senators Names, their distinct Characters, and Speeches, and Advice; and after much and wise Consultation, an Expedient being found out and agreed upon, he dismisses the Senate, and concludes the Satyr.

465

Once more Crispinus call'd upon the Stage,
(Nor shall once more suffice) provokes my Rage:
A Monster, to whom ev'ry Vice lays claim,
Without one Virtue to redeem his Fame.
Feeble and sick, yet strong in Lust alone,
The rank Adult'rer preys on all the Town,
All but the Widows nauseous Charms go down.
What matter then how stately is the Arch
Where his tir'd Mules slow with their Burden march?
What matter then how thick and long the Shade
Through which, he is by sweating Slaves, convey'd?
How many Acres near the City Walls,
Or new-built Palaces, his own he calls?
No ill Man's happy; least of all is he
Whose Study 'tis to corrupt Chastity.

467

The incestuous Brute, who the veil'd Vestal Maid
But lately to his impious Bed betray'd,
Who for her Crime,

Crispinus had deflour'd a Vestal Virgin, but by his Favour with Domitian, she escap'd the Punishment due to her Offence, which was to be bury'd alive by Numa's Law; as may be seen in Livy, l. 1. and is more particularly describ'd in Plutarch's Life of Numa.

if Laws their Course might have,
Ought to descend alive into the Grave.

But now of slighter Faults; and yet the same
By others done, the Censor's Justice claim.
For what good Men ignoble count and base,
Is Virtue here, and does Crispinus grace:
In this he's safe, whate'er we write of him,
The Person is more odious than the Crime:
And so all Satyr's lost. The lavish Slave
Six

Six thousand of the Roman Sestertii, which makes six Sestertia, according to our Account, 461. 17 s. 6d.

thousand Pieces for a Barbel gave:
A Sesterce for each Pound it weigh'd, as they
Give out, that hear great things, but greater say.
If by this Bribe well plac'd, he would ensnare
Some sapless Usurer that wants an Heir,

469

Or if this Present the sly Courtier meant,
Should to some Punk of Quality be sent,
That in her easie Chair in State does ride,
The Glasses all drawn up on ev'ry Side,
I'd praise his Cunning; but expect not this,
For his own Gut he bought the stately Fish.
Now ev'n

A Man for Gluttony and Prodigality famous even to a Proverb, who having spent most of his vast Estate upon his Gut, for fear of Want poyson'd himself. Senec.

Apicius Frugal seems, and Poor,
Outvy'd in Luxury unknown before.

Gave you, Crispinus, you this mighty Sum?
You, that, for want of other Rags, did come
In your own Country Paper wrapp'd, to Rome.
Do Scales and Fins bear Price to this Excess?
You might have bought the Fisherman for less.
For less some Provinces whole Acres sell,
Nay,

Part of Italy, near the Adriatick Gulf, where Land, it seems, was very cheap, either for the Barrenness and cragged Height of the Mountains, or for the unwholsomness of the Air, and the Wind Atabulus. Horat. Lib. 1. Sat. 5. Montes Apulia notos—quos torret Atabulus & quos nunquam erepsemus, &c.

in Apulia, if you bargain well,
A Manor wou'd cost less than such a Meal.

471

What think we then of his

The Emperor Domitian.

luxurious Lord?
What Banquets loaded that Imperial Board?
When in one Dish, that, taken from the rest,
His constant Table wou'd have hardly mist,
So many Sesterces were swallow'd down,
To stuff one Scarlet-coated Court Buffoon,
Whom Rome of all her Knights now chiefest greets,
From crying stinking Fish about her Streets.

Begin, Calliope, but not to sing:
Plain, honest Truth we for our Subject bring.
Help then, ye young Pierian Maids to tell
A downright Narrative of what befel.
Afford me willingly your sacred Aids,
Me that have call'd you young, me that have stil'd you Maids

When he, with whom

Domitian was the last and worst of the Flavian Family, which tho' at first obscure, yet had produc'd great and good Men. Reipublica nequaquam pœnitenda, says Sueton. 9. For of this Family were Vespasian and Titus.

the Flavian Race decay'd,
The groaning World with Iron Scepter sway'd
When

Domitian who could not so much as bear with Patience the mention of Baldness, tho' in Jest only, and objected to another, as Suetonius in his Life tells us. And who, for his Cruelty, is here call'd a second Nero.

a bald Nero Reign'd, and servile Rome obey'd,

473

Where Venus Shrine does fair Ancona grace,
A Turbut taken of prodigious Space,
Fill'd the extended Net, not less than those
That dull Mæotis does with Ice enclose,
'Till conquer'd by the Sun's prevailing Ray,
It opens to the Pontick Sea their Way;
And throws them out unweildy with their Growth,
Fat with long Ease, and a whole Winter's Sloth:
The wise Commander of the Boat and Lines,
For

The Emperor Domitian call'd so, either from his Instituting the College of the Alban Priests, of whom he was as it were Chief; or for taking upon him the Office of Pontifex Maximus in the Condemnation of the Vestal Virgin Cornetia; or, more generally, because often the Emperors assum'd both the Title and Office of High Priest.

our High-Priest the stately Prey designs;
For who that Lordly Fish durst sell or buy,
So many Spies and Court-Informers nigh?
No Shoar but of this Vermin Swarms does bear,
Searchers of Mud and Sea-weed! that would swear
The Fish had long in Cæsar's Ponds been fed,
And from its Lord undutifully fled;
So, justly ought to be again restor'd:
Nay, if you credit Sage

Both Men of Consular Degree: Lawyers, and Spies, and Informers, and so Favourers of Domitian.

Palphurius Word,

475

Or dare rely on Armillatus Skill,
Whatever Fish the vulgar Fry excel
Belong to Cæsar, wheresoe'er they swim,
By their own Worth confiscated to him.

The Boatman then shall a wise Present make,
And give the Fish before the Seizers take.

Now sickly Autumn to dry Frosts gave Way,
Cold Winter rag'd, and fresh preserv'd the Prey;
Yet with such Haste the busie Fishes flew,
As if a hot South-Wind Corruption blew:
And now he reach'd the Lake,

Alba Longa built by Ascanius, about fifteen Miles from Rome, was destroy'd after by Tullus Hostilius, the Temples only excepted, (Liv. l. 1.) The Albans upon this their Misfortunes neglecting their Worship, were by sundry Prodigies commanded to restore their Ancient Rites, the chief of which was the keeping perpetually burning the Vestal Fire, which was brought thither by Æneas and his Trojans as a fatal Pledge of the Perpetuity of the Roman Empire.

were what remains
Of Alba, still her ancient Rites retains,
Still Worships Vesta,

There was a more stately Temple erected to Vesta at Rome by Numa, than this at Alba, where the same Ceremonies were us'd.

tho' an humbler Way,
Nor lets the hallow'd Trojan Fire decay.

477

The wondring Croud that to strange Sights resort,
And choak'd a while his Passage to the Court,
At length gives way; ope flies the Palace-Gate,
The Turbut enters in, without the

The Senate always so call'd. Patres Conscripti.

Fathers wait;
The Boatman straight does to Atrides press,
And thus presents his Fish, and his Address:

Accept, Dread Sir, this Tribute from the Main,
Too great for private Kitchins to contain.
To your glad Genius sacrifice this Day,
Let common Meats respectfully give Way.
Haste to unload your Stomachs to receive
This Turbut, that for you did only live.
So long preserv'd to be Imperial Food,
Glad of the Net, and to be taken proud.

How fulsom this! how gross! yet this takes well,
And the vain Prince with empty Pride does swell.

479

Nothing so monstrous can be said or feign'd,
But with Belief and Joy is entertain'd,
When to his Face the worthless Wretch is prais'd,
Whom vile Court-Flatt'ry to a God has rais'd.

But oh hard Fate! the Palace Stores no Dish
Afford, capacious of the mighty Fish.
To sage Debate are summon'd all the Peers,
His trusty, and much-hated, Counsellors,
In whose pale Looks that ghastly Terror sat,
That haunts the dang'rous Friendships of the Great.

Some say that of the People. of this Country, which is Part of Illyricum, the Romans made their Cryers, because of their loud Voices. Others take Liburnus for the Proper Name of one Man—Liburnus that the Senate call'd.

The loud Liburnian that the Senate call'd,
Run, run; he's set, he's set, no sooner baul'd,
But with his Robe snatch't up in haste, does come
Pegasus,

A Citizen of Alba, a very Learned Lawyer, and Præfect or Chief Magistrate of Rome. He calls him here Bayliff: As if Rome, by Domitian's Cruelty, had so far lost its Liberty and Privileges, that it now was no better than a Country Village, and fit to be Govern'd by no better than a Bailiff.

Bailiff of affrighted Rome.
What more were Præfects then? The Best he was,
And faithfullest Expounder of the Laws.

481

Yet in ill Times thought all things manag'd best,
When Justice exercis'd her Sword the least.

This was he that made the known Jest upon Domitian's killing Flies. When one Day Domitian being alone in his Closet, and being ask'd, Whether there was any one left within with the Emperor? He answer'd, No, not so much as a Fly. The Names and Characters of most of these Senators here mention'd may be found in Suetonius's Life of Domitian, and in Tacitus.

Old Crispus next, pleasant tho' old, appears,
His Wit nor Humour yielding to his Years.
His Temper mild, Good-nature join'd with Sense,
And Manners charming as his Eloquence.
Who fitter for a useful Friend than he,
To the great Ruler of the Earth and Sea,
If as his Thoughts were just, his Tongue were free?
If it were safe to vent his gen'rous Mind
To Rome's dire Plague, and Terror of Mankind,
If cruel Pow'r could softning Counsel bear;
But what's so tender as a Tyrant's Ear?
With whom whoever, tho' a Fav'rite, spake,
At ev'ry Sentence set his Life at Stake,
Tho' the Discourse were of no weightier Things,
Than sultry Summers, or unhealthful Springs.

483

This well he knew, and therefore never try'd,
With his weak Arms to stem the stronger Tide.
Nor did all Rome, grown Spiritless, supply
A Man that for bold Truth durst bravely die.
So safe by wise complying Silence, he
Ev'n in that Court did fourscore Summers see.

Next him Acilius, tho' his Age the same,
With eager Haste to the grand Council came:
With him a Youth, unworthy of the Fate
That did too near his growing Virtues wait,
Urg'd by the Tyrant's Envy, Fear, or Hate.
(But 'tis long since Old Age began to be
In noble Blood no less than Prodigy,
Whence 'tis I'd rather be of

Of an obscure and unknown Family.

Giants Birth,
A Pigmy Brother to those Sons of Earth.)
Unhappy Youth! whom from his destin'd End,
No well-dissembled Madness could defend;

485

When naked in the Alban Theater,
In Lybian Bears he fixt his hunting Spear.
Who sees not now thro' the Lord's thin Disguise,
That long seem'd Fools to prove at last more wise?
That State-Court Trick is now too open laid,
Who now admires the

'Tis a known Story, how Brutus finding that his own Brother, and some of the most considerable Men of Rome had been put to Death by Tarquinius Superbus, counterfeited himself a Madman or Fool, and so avoided the Tyrant's Cruelty, 'till he had gain'd a fit time to destroy him, revenge his Brother's and Countrymens Deaths, and free Rome.

Part old Brutus play'd?
Those honest Times might swallow this Pretence,
When

In those ancient and more simple times, when it was the Custom never to shave their Beards: For 400 Years there was no such thing as a Barber heard of in Rome.

the King's Beard was deeper than his Sense.

Next Rubrius came,

For Domitian's Cruelty reach'd even to the Common People, and those of lower Birth, which (in the End of this Satyr) the Poet tells us, caus'd his Destruction.

tho' not of Noble Race,
With equal Marks of Terrour in his Face.
Pale with the gnawing Guilt and inward Shame
Of an old Crime that is not fit to name.
Worse, yet in Scandal taking more Delight,
Than

Nero, who wrote a Satyr upon Quintianus, whom he charges with his own profligate Lewdness and Debauchery. Tacit. Annal 15.

the vile Pathick that durst Satyr write.

Montanus Belly next, advancing slow
Before the sweating Senator did go.

487

Crispinus after, but much sweeter comes,
Scented with costly Oils and Eastern Gums,
More than would serve two Fun'rals for Perfumes.

Then Pompey, none more skill'd in the Court-Game
Of cutting Throats with a soft Whisper, came.

Next Fuscus, he who many a peaceful Day
For

Cornelius Fuscus, a Nobleman of no manner of Experience or more Knowledge in War-Affairs, than what he had study'd in his own Country Retirement, was yet by Domitian twice sent with an Army against the Dacians, in the last of which his Army was defeated, and himself slain.

Dacian Vultures was reserv'd a Prey,
'Till having study'd War enough at home,
He led abroad the unhappy Arms of Rome.

Cunning Vejento next, and by his Side
Bloody Catullus leaning on his Guide,
Decrepit, yet a furious Lover he,
And deeply smit with Charms he could not see.

489

A Monster, that even this worst Age out-vies,
Conspicuous and above the common Size.
A blind base Flatt'rer,

The common Stands for Beggars.

from some Bridge or Gate,
Rais'd to a murd'ring Minister of State.
Deserving still to beg upon the Road,
And bless each passing Waggon and its Load.
None more admir'd the Fish; he in its Praise
With Zeal his Voice, with Zeal his Hands did raise,
But to the Left all his fine Things did say,
Whilst on his right the unseen Turbut lay.
So he the fam'd Cilician Fencer prais'd,
And at each Hit with Wonder seem'd amaz'd.
So did the Scenes and Stage Machines admire,
And Boys that flew thro' Canvas Clouds in Wire.

Nor came Vejento short; but as inspir'd
By thee, Bellona, by thy Fury fir'd,

491

Turns Prophet: See, the mighty Omen, see,
He cries, of some illustrious Victory!
Some Captive King, thee his new Lord shall own:
Or from his British Chariot headlong thrown
The

One of the ancient British Kings.

proud Arviragus came tumbling down!
The Monster's foreign.

He makes the Flatterer call the sharp Fins rising on the Fishes Back, Spears; and to signifie and portend that Domitian shall stick the like in some Foreign Enemy.

Mark the pointed Spears
That from thy Hand on his pierc'd Back he wears!
Who Nobler could, or plainer things presage?
Yet one thing scap'd him, the Prophetick Rage
Shew'd not the Turbut's Country, nor its Age.

At length by Cæsar the grand Question's put:
My Lords, your Judgment; shall the Fish be cut?
Far be it, far from us! Montanus cries;
Let's not dishonour thus the Noble Prize!
A Pot of finest Earth, thin, deep, and wide
Some

Some skilful Potter. Alluding to the old Fable of Prometheus, whose Skill in this Art was such, that he made a Man of Clay.

skilful quick Prometheus must provide.
Clay and the forming Wheel prepare with Speed.
But, Cæsar, be it from henceforth decreed,

493

That Potters on the Royal Progress wait,
T'assist in these Emergencies of State.

This Council pleas'd; nor could it fail to take,
So fit, so worthy of the Man that spake.
The old Court Riots he remember'd well,
Could Tales of Nero's Midnight Suppers tell,
When Falern Wines the lab'ring Lungs did fire,
And to new Dainties kindled false Desire.
In Arts of Eating none more early Train'd,
None in my time had equal Skill attain'd.
He whither

The Circean Promontory, nam'd from Circe, that liv'd there on the Shore of Campania.

Circe's Rock his Oysters bore,
Or

Between Bajæ and Puteoli.

Lucrine Lake, or

Rutupæ or Rutupi, an Ancient Town's Name on the Kentish Shore, suppos'd to be our Richborough. These were all famous in those Times for Oysters.

the Rutupian Shoar,
Knew at first Taste, nay at first Sight cou'd tell
A Crab or Lobster's Country by its Shell.

They rise, and straight all with respectful Awe,
At the Word giv'n, obsequiously withdraw,

495

Whom full of eager Haste, Surprize, and Fear,
Our mighty Prince had summon'd to appear;
As if some News he'd of the Catti tell,
Or that the fierce Sicambrians did rebel:
As if Expresses from all Parts had come
With fresh Alarms threatning the Fate of Rome.

What Folly this! But oh! that all the rest
Of his dire Reign had thus been spent in Jest!
And all that Time such Trifles had employ'd
In which so many Nobles he destroy'd!
He safe, they unreveng'd, to the Disgrace
Of the surviving, tame, Patrician Race!
But when he dreadful to the Rabble grew,
Him, whom so many Lords had slain, they slew.

University of Virginia Library

THE FOURTH SATYR OF JUVENAL.

The ARGUMENT.