University of Virginia Library

Epilogue, Spoken by Mrs. Quynn.

The Author is to beg your kindness now;
He therefore chose me out the Task to do:
For Women are best skill'd in wheadling you.
He knows not yet how you have Censur'd him,
Whether his Epilogue you will esteem,
As a glad Flourish after Victory,
Or the Swans Note, that sings when She's to die:
But finding 'twas a Tax upon the Play,
He rush'd on boldly, and thus bid me say,—
To the fair Sex he first this Answer gives,
If they shou'd chance to ask, why Helen lives?
It was the truth, as History declares,
(If there were any such as Trojan Wars,)
If this fam'd Seige were no Bear-Garden Fray,
And Ajax was no Butcher, as some say—
Yet let her live, and find a far worse Doom,
T'a Jealous Cuckold to be ty'd at home,
Think how to Jilt, and never have the Pow'r,
And that's a Curse that many of us indure.—
Next, to the Men, if they're displeas'd, to find
Her Husband, after all this Stir, so kind,
We must confess that it is strange to see;
Yet some of you have don't, more quietly;
Not like th'Heroick Cuckold who for's Bride
Has at the Bar as fierce a Combat try'd,
As Hector, and Achilles ever did,
Of which more fam'd Records are in the Hall,
Than are of Troy, or Amadis de Gaule—
As for the Men of Gallantry, and Wit,
That love like Paris, and like Hector fight,
They will not sure be sorry when they see
This good Example for their Ease to be:
For who among you's such a hungry Lover
Wou'd after ten years eat the same Dish over.
Next for Andromache, 'tis hard to find
A Wife that is so constant, or so kind:
We'ave no such foolish Widow in our Nation
That will be taught by such a Scurvy Fashion;
But soon as e're She can, think of betrothing
Some proper, brawny Fellow that has nothing.