University of Virginia Library

Academics

The academic world receives
its share of comment too. "If
all the world's economists were
laid end to end they still
wouldn't reach a conclusion."

"Isn't science wonderful,"
someone asks. "You must be a
pre-med," another snorts in
reply.

"Dick Tracy" writes that
"The nation that controls
magnetism will control the
universe."

A wilting Hofstadter
writes, "Those who bring
happiness to others can't keep
it from themselves. History
tests neither bring nor instill
happiness."

Someone with a dislike of
empiricism scribbles, "It has
been shown that there is a
perfect correlation between
peppermint lifesavers and
baldness in frogs."

Surprisingly only ten of the
over one thousand graffiti on
the carrel walls dealt with
drugs. "A reefer a day keeps
reality away." "No left turn
unstoned." But there is a
strong anti-drug sentiment in
the profession, which has its
opposing echo. "Drugs make
you strange" is countered by
"Thank God." "Drugs are bad"
is met by "Ban aspirin."

Harper's asserts that men's
rooms walls are forums for the
New Left's political views. This
is not so in carrel scribbling.
Little space is devoted to
urging minorities to unite to
smash the state. But one little
appreciated minority is
disenchanted. "Munchkins of
the world unite! We're not tall
enough to lose anything." The
idea dwarfs the imagination!

A number of well known
figures are mentioned by name.
"Andrew Jackson was getting
it off Peggy Eaton."

"Roosevelt eats spam,"
occurs often.

"Virginia deserves Bill
Scott, but did we have to loose
him on the whole country."