Miscellanies in prose and verse on several occasions, by Claudero [i.e. James Wilson], son of Nimrod the Mighty Hunter. The Fourth Edition with large Additions |
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The History of a Norland Barber; being a
Warning to all saucy Shavers, both in Town and Country.
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 | Miscellanies in prose and verse |  |
The History of a Norland Barber; being a Warning to all saucy Shavers, both in Town and Country.
From Scotia's north a puppy came,Excuse the place and puppy's name;
As authors differ ev'ry way,
His name's a secret to this day.
Quite void of science and of arts,
He wander'd to the southern parts;
T'avoid starvation in the north,
He took a boat and cross'd the Forth,
And soon in Ed'nburgh did arrive,
Where shaving trade he long did drive.
The want of learning and of sense
He soon supply'd with impudence,
And ev'ry day that he arose
Caught sev'ral hundreds by the nose.
On sooty beards his razor ran,
Till he became an expert man;
Nor do you think I tell a jest,
A carrot then he thought a feast.
Bedaub'd with flour, pometum, grease,
He'd carry wigs to whom you please.
Authors alledge too by the bye,
He told his patients many a lie;
Nor for detection was afraid,
As lies were part of barber-trade.
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Whose wit was gleg as any razor,
Both pleas'd his master and the town,
And soon became of great renown.
His fame did reach a noble peer,
Whom long he serv'd with love and fear;
'Till suffocate with elevation,
He quite forgot his former station.
Despis'd his fellows, and disdain'd
To eat what nobles entertain'd.
Satan with pleasure view'd the youth,
Brim-full of pride, and void of truth:
Quoth Belzebub, the grand deceiver;
I'd quickly snatch this saucy shaver,
But hell already is so cramm'd,
Such multitudes of barbers damn'd,
I have of them now so great store,
I can't find blocks for any more.
| Miscellanies in prose and verse | |