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All the workes of Iohn Taylor the Water-Poet

Being Sixty and three in Number. Collected into one Volume by the Author [i.e. John Taylor]: With sundry new Additions, corrected, reuised, and newly Imprinted

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THE NECESSITIE OF Hanging.

Of Hangings there's diuersity of fashions,
Almost as many as are sundry Nations:
For in the world all things so hanged are,
That any thing vnhang'd is strange and rare.
Earth hangs in the concauity of Water,
And Water hangs within the Ayerie matter,
The Ayre hangs in the Fierie continent:
Thus Element doth hang in Element,
(Without foundation) all the Massie Globe
Hangs, which the skies encompasse like a Robe,
For as an egge, the yolke within the white,
The white within the skin's enuellop'd quite,
The skin within the shell doth outmost lye:
Eu'n so these Elements hang midst the skie.
First, all the world where mortals liue, we see
Within the Orbe of Luna hanged be;
Aboue her, Mercurie his course doth steere,
And next aboue him is bright Venus Sphere.
And in the fourth, and middle firmament,
Sol keepes his hot and fiery Regiment.
Next aboue that runs Mars, that star of warre:
Beyond him Iupiter, that Iouiall starre;
Then last is sullen Saturnes ample bounds,
Who once in thirty yeeres the world surrounds;
This earthly Globe (for which men fight & brawle)
Compar'd to Heauen, is like an Artom small,
Or as a Needles point compar'd to it,
So it to Heauen may be compared fit;
And it doth Hang, and hath its residence
I'th centre of the skies circumference.
Thus to proue Hanging naturall, I proue,
We in a Hanging world doe liue and moue.
Man is a little world, wherein we see.
The great worlds abstract or epitomie.
And if we note each linament and lim,
There are not many parts vnhang'd of him;
His haire which to his head and beard belongs,
Hangs, if not turn'd vp with the Barbers tongs,
His armes, his hands, his legges and feet we know,
Doe all hang pendant downewards as they grow:
Ther's nothing of him that doth hanging skip,
Except his eares, his nether teeth and lip,
And when he's crost or sullen any way,
He mumps, and lowres, and hangs the lip, they say:
That I a wise mans sayings must approue,
Man is a tree, whose root doth grow aboue,
Within his braines, whose sprigs & branches round,
From head to foot grow downward to the ground.
Thus world to world, and man to man doth call,
And tels him, Hanging is most naturall:
The word Dependant doth informe our reason,
That Hanging will be neuer out of season.
All that depends doth hang, which doth expresse,
That Great men are like Iybbets for the lesse.
It is an old phrase, many yeeres past gone,
That such a Lord hath many hangers on;
Thereby describing, that all mens Attendants
As it were hangers on, were call'd

All dependants are hangers on.

Dependants:

And sure of all men, they are best indeed,
Who haue most hangers on to cloath and feed;
For he that hath the meanes, and not the grace,
To helpe the needie, is a Miser base.
Hee's no good Steward, but a hatefull Thiefe,
That keepes from good Dependants their reliefe:
And of all Theeues, he hanging doth deserue,
Who hath the power to feed, and lets men sterue.
To end this point, this consequence I'll grant,
He that hath wealth, no hangers on can want;
For since the time that mankinde first began,
It is a destinie ordain'd to man,
The meane vpon the mighty should depend,
And all vpon the Mightiest should attend.
Thus through all ages, Countries and Dominions,
We each on other hang like ropes of Onions.
Some wealthy slaues, whose consciences condem,
Will hang themselues, lest others hang on them;
And some spend all on Hangers on so fast,
That they are forc'd to steale, and hang at last.
If they from these Extremes themselues could wean,
There is betwixt them both a Golden meane,
Which would direct their superfluities,
They would not hang themselues for niggardize,
Nor wastefully or prodigally spend,
Till want bring them to hanging in the end,
And they and many others, by their purse,
Might scape that hanging which is cald a curse.

133

There's many a Gallant made of foole and feather,
Of Gold and Veluet, Silke, and Spanish leather,
Whose ragged Hangers on haue mou'd my minde,
To see pride goe before, and shame behinde,
With scarce a button, or an elboe whole,
A breech, or any shooe that's worth a sole:
Those that like golden lybbets, and their traines
Are like poore tatter'd Theeues hang'd vp in chains.
He that doth suffer Whores, or Theeues, or Knaues,
Base flattering Villaines, or such kinde of slaues,
To hang vpon him, and knowes what they are,
That man vnto a Gallowse I compare.
That Vintner I account no friend of mine,
Who for good money drawes me scuruie wine,
And by the rule of Conscience (not of Law)
That he is fitter made to hang, then draw.
The Lawyer that at length doth spin mens causes,
With false delayes, and dilatory clauses,
Who makes a trade to broach and draw contention,
For him a hanging were a good preuention.
But holla, Muse, come backe, you beare my Rime,
To hanging in good earnest ere the time.
There are a many sorts of hangings yet
Behinde, which I by no meanes must forget:
One hanging is a necessary thing,
Which is a pretty gamball, cald a Swing,
And men of good repute I oft haue seene
To hang, and stretch, and totter, for the spleene:
This hanging is a military course,
Not by the Law, but strength of armes, and force:
Thus euery morning for a little spurt,
A man may hang himselfe, and doe no hurt.
This hanging oft (like Tyburne hath a tricke,
Saues charge of physicke, or of being sicke.
Besides, the word Hang is so much in vse,
That few or none will take't as an abuse;
It doth a great mans kindnesse much approue,
When he shall bid a man Be hang'd in loue:
And with some men 'tis common courtesie,
To say, Farewell, be hang'd, that's twice God bwy.
The pictures of the dearest friends we haue,
Although their corps are rotten in the graue,
We hang them for a reuerend memory
To vs, and vnto our posterity.
Some hang their wiues in picture, which haue cause
To hang their persons, wer't not for the lawes:
Some hang their heires in picture, who would faine
Wish their good fathers hang'd, their lands to gaine.
I oft haue seene good garments for mens wearing,
Haue very thriftily beene hang'd to ayring;
And I haue seen those garments (like good fellows)
Hang kindly with their master at the Gallowse,
And then into the Hangmans Wardrobe drop,
Haue beene againe hang'd in a Broakers shop,
Which after by a Cut purse bought might be;
And make another iourney to the Tree;
Twixt which, and twixt the Broaker, it might goe
Or ride, some twelue or thirteene times, or moe.
Thus th' hangmans haruest, and the Brokers grow,
They reape the crop, which sin and shame doth sow.
There are rich Hangings made of Tapestrie,
Of Arras, and of braue embrodery;
Those are for Princes, and for men of worth,
T'adorne their roomes, and set their greatnes forth.
But as dead bones in painted Tombes doe bide,
These Hangings, filthy rotten wals doe hide.
A Harts-horne to a post fast nailed on,
Serues well for men to hang their hats vpon:
But if they knew their heads would serue the turne,
They would not shift their hats from horne to horn.
Mens swords in Hangers Hang, fast by their side,
Their Stirrops Hang, when as they vse to ride:
Our Conies and our Deere are Hang'd in toiles,
Our meat hangs o'r the fire when as it boiles;
Our light Hangs in the Lanthorne, all men sees
Our fruit wee eat was hang'd vpon the trees,
Signes hang on posts, shew whereas tradsmen dwels,
In steeples all men know are Hang'd the Bels,
The scales or ballance hangs where things are weigh'd
Goods Hang'd in Craines, that's in or out conuei'd;
Yards, sailes, sheets, tacks, lists, caskets, bolins, braces,
Are fitly hang'd in their conuenient places.
The compasse that directs where windes doe blow,
Is Hang'd vpon the Needles point we know:
In stately buildings, Timber, Lead and Stone,
Are Hang'd and hoist, or Buildings would be none.
Our Maps wherein the world described be,
Are all Hang'd vp against the wals we see:
Our Cazements Hang as they doe ope and shut,
Our Curtaines Hang, which 'bout our beds we put;
Our Hogs are Hang'd, else Bacon we might looke.
Doores Hang on hinges, or I am mistooke;
And many a trusty Padlocke Hangs no doubt,
To let in honest men, and keepe knaues out.
Sea-Cabins Hang, where poore men sleepe and rest,
Our Clokes Hang on our backs 'tis manifest:
The Viall, Citterne, the Bandore and Lute,
Are cas'd or vncas'd, all Hang'd vp and mute:
Our Linnen (being wash'd) must Hang to dry,
Or else Lice will Hang on and multiply:
Thus Hanging's beneficiall to all States,
Whilst Gods dread curse Hangs o'r the reprobates.
And as for those that take my lines amis,
And will be pleas'd to be displeas'd with this,

134

For groats a piece, nay lesse, for three pence either,
I'll giue them all leaue to be Hang'd together;
Since Hanging then is prou'd so naturall,
So beneficiall, so generall,
So apt, so necessary, and so fit,
Our reason tels vs we should honour it.
It is a good mans life, and 'tis their death,
That rob and rifle men of goods and breath:
This kind of Hanging all offences ends,
From which God euer blesse me and my friends.
I from the Hangman this conclusion draw,
He is the fatall period of the Law:
If thieues or traytors into mischiefe runne,
If he haue done with them, then they haue done.
'Tis often seene that many haplesse men
Haue beene condemn'd and iudg'd, reprieu'd agen,
And pardon'd, haue committed new transgressions,
And in againe oft many a Size and Sessions:
When many warnings mend them not therefore,
The Hangman warnes them, they offend no more.
Hee's the Catastrophe and Epilogue
Of many of the desperate Catalogue;
And he is one that cannot wanted be,
But still God keepe him farre enough from me.
 

Simile.

All the world is in comparison for greatnesse to the Heauens, as a hand-worme or a Nit may be compared to the world.

Wee liue in a hanging world.

Rich men are poore mens Gallowses.

That's a Roague.

That's an Asse.

A Swing or stretch for exercise and health.

If all traitors, hypocrites, flatterers, extortioners, oppressours, bribetakers, cheaters, panders, bawds, &c. were hang'd vp in the woods on seuerall trees, there is no Arras, or Tapestry can grace and adorne a Princes Court, as those Hangings could become a Common-wealth.

Here is an army of Hangings.