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“O Life,” spake one, “Life, Life! wert thou for a curse
Or blessing given to me, thine eager wooer?
To thee for better was it, or for worse,
Or blessing given to me, thine eager wooer?
To thee for better was it, or for worse,
“My soul was wedded, welded? Whence this lure
That drew me ever downwards, as the bee
Sinks on the rose's golden breast, secure
That drew me ever downwards, as the bee
Sinks on the rose's golden breast, secure
“Of drowning bliss? Oh rose of life, to me
What wert thou? bloom, song, sunshine, fragrance fleet
Mingled unto a wine of extasy!
What wert thou? bloom, song, sunshine, fragrance fleet
Mingled unto a wine of extasy!
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“Thine odour chained me as the dancers' feet
Are chained to the quick music from the string
That drops like seeded pearl in measured beat.
Are chained to the quick music from the string
That drops like seeded pearl in measured beat.
“With little children playing, child or king,
Content I played, nor watched Time's shaken glass,
Then slept as one at noonday slumbering
Content I played, nor watched Time's shaken glass,
Then slept as one at noonday slumbering
“Sleeps bedded warm upon the thymy grass,
And wakes to hear adown the darkening lane
The reapers, gleaners, glad and weary, pass.
And wakes to hear adown the darkening lane
The reapers, gleaners, glad and weary, pass.
“Now ask ye of my sheaf? what golden grain
Garnered and stored, what good beneath the sun
Through me achieved, accomplished? question vain!
Garnered and stored, what good beneath the sun
Through me achieved, accomplished? question vain!
“Is it not written fair, ‘Here lieth one
Who danced and pleased the people,’ on my tomb?’
Awhile he paused,—“Is all that life begun
Who danced and pleased the people,’ on my tomb?’
Awhile he paused,—“Is all that life begun
“Now ended and for ever? What fierce doom
Hath shut the after-world from known delights?
Hath the wide sapphire of Heaven's arch no room
Hath shut the after-world from known delights?
Hath the wide sapphire of Heaven's arch no room
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“To hang within it Earth's two blessed lights?
Can hearts that ache with splendour miss the old
Soft interchange of blissful days and nights?
Can hearts that ache with splendour miss the old
Soft interchange of blissful days and nights?
“Do eyes meet here, do spirits clasp and fold
Each other as the little children held
My hand?” While thus half querulous, half bold,
Each other as the little children held
My hand?” While thus half querulous, half bold,
He spake, my hearing went from him, compelled
To track another voice more sweet than sighs
Of youth, or smiles in aged eyes beheld.
To track another voice more sweet than sighs
Of youth, or smiles in aged eyes beheld.
“Love, Love,” it spake, “to me wert thou Life's prize,
Life's root and crown, Life's wine desired, discerned
In the dim grape-flower by mine eager eyes
Life's root and crown, Life's wine desired, discerned
In the dim grape-flower by mine eager eyes
“Long ere within the cup it moved and burned;
While life was young to gladden, warm to woo,
From all that was not Love my spirit turned.
While life was young to gladden, warm to woo,
From all that was not Love my spirit turned.
“It was not loveliness my heart that drew,
Not Beauty's thrall was I, but Love's true slave,
That took the wayside flower that nearest grew,
Not Beauty's thrall was I, but Love's true slave,
That took the wayside flower that nearest grew,
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“And found it fair enough for loving! brave
Was I through love that lifteth up the low,
Through love that lives to serve, that dies to save.”
Was I through love that lifteth up the low,
Through love that lives to serve, that dies to save.”
“Let love meet love,” I said, “and bring to blow
Life's gorgeous rose, and triumph o'er the thorn.”
But even while I spake these words, a slow
Life's gorgeous rose, and triumph o'er the thorn.”
But even while I spake these words, a slow
And searching wind breathed over me forlorn,
And at my spirit gnawed a weariness
Of men and things, a chill recoil and scorn
And at my spirit gnawed a weariness
Of men and things, a chill recoil and scorn
That bade me ask, amid life's hollow stress,
What meant the ancient Eastern multitude?
Was wisdom hid within their bitterness?
What meant the ancient Eastern multitude?
Was wisdom hid within their bitterness?
Would'st thou no evil find, then do no good.
Hath life no heart to answer back to mine?
No hint of beating pulse, of breathing blood?
Hath life no heart to answer back to mine?
No hint of beating pulse, of breathing blood?
Have I embraced a corpse that makes no sign?
Is life a shadow, love a mocking show?
And while I sought it as a boon divine,
Is life a shadow, love a mocking show?
And while I sought it as a boon divine,
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Have I but walked within the dying glow
Left by His steps upon our Earth, who came
To kindle fire, and left it long ago?
Left by His steps upon our Earth, who came
To kindle fire, and left it long ago?
I had not striven to guard my soul's pure flame,
Nor hoard my spirit's fragrance; I grew old,
Life's day wore on, and of my birth and name
Nor hoard my spirit's fragrance; I grew old,
Life's day wore on, and of my birth and name
Were none to gather round, my hearth was cold;
The rest had ventured little, yet had won
Rich usury of love and praise, and gold.
The rest had ventured little, yet had won
Rich usury of love and praise, and gold.
They saw their children playing in the sun,
While I, who strove to lift life's curse, and wrest
Its secret, ending made where I begun.
While I, who strove to lift life's curse, and wrest
Its secret, ending made where I begun.
No single heart was mine, no life was blest
Through me—I died alone,—yet not alone,
Was not the Father with me?”—
Through me—I died alone,—yet not alone,
Was not the Father with me?”—
“So thy quest
“Ended like mine, with naught to call thine own,
Made end with all fond searching first and last,
All ventured, dared, imperilled,—nothing known.”
Made end with all fond searching first and last,
All ventured, dared, imperilled,—nothing known.”
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With these keen words, like eager sword-strokes fast
Flung forth, methought another spirit passed;
I knew him by the mighty shade he cast.
Flung forth, methought another spirit passed;
I knew him by the mighty shade he cast.
“Yet not to failing love, but unto Truth
I gave the promise of my golden years,
And tracked her flying footsteps as the youth
I gave the promise of my golden years,
And tracked her flying footsteps as the youth
“Tracks the bright nymph that flits and disappears,
And lures him on through paths that weave and wind,
Till in the forest thick with spells and fears
And lures him on through paths that weave and wind,
Till in the forest thick with spells and fears
“She leaves him desolate, and mad, and blind.
Rich was the life I lost, the soul I gave!
And strong the charm wherewith I sought to bind
Rich was the life I lost, the soul I gave!
And strong the charm wherewith I sought to bind
“Her strength to mine! I rifled earth, air, wave,
Yea, oft the dead I questioned! but no word
I found, nor any that could guide or save.
Yea, oft the dead I questioned! but no word
I found, nor any that could guide or save.
“Then from my way died off each flower; no bird
Sang from the blasted bough, a crash—a cry—
Of giant tree that fell, afar I heard,
Sang from the blasted bough, a crash—a cry—
Of giant tree that fell, afar I heard,
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“Or fierce beast snared in deathly agony;
And all was silent; then afar I spied
A few, who on a mountain pathway high
And all was silent; then afar I spied
A few, who on a mountain pathway high
“Held on their upward way, by love nor pride
Seduced, enticed by knowledge nor dismayed
By fear,—the followers of the Crucified.
Seduced, enticed by knowledge nor dismayed
By fear,—the followers of the Crucified.
“These lingered not for song of bird, nor stayed
To mark what hues the glittering insect glossed,
That dipt across their path from sun to shade.
To mark what hues the glittering insect glossed,
That dipt across their path from sun to shade.
“These won their steadfast goal—and have I lost,
Who flung my soul within the crucible,
And saw it shrink, nor counted up the cost,
Who flung my soul within the crucible,
And saw it shrink, nor counted up the cost,
“So that Truth's bright elixir clearer fell
In sparkling drops? Of all I ventured there
Is nothing found? Have I loved Truth so well
In sparkling drops? Of all I ventured there
Is nothing found? Have I loved Truth so well
“To lose my Christ? lost God through loving men?
—Speak now, my soul! if all to win and lose
Once more were thine, if choice were given again,
—Speak now, my soul! if all to win and lose
Once more were thine, if choice were given again,
“Would it be thine the surer way to choose!—
Though o'er my grave no word of hope was said,
Above it raised no cross, behold the dews
Though o'er my grave no word of hope was said,
Above it raised no cross, behold the dews
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“Lie on it fresh! Though all whom once I led
Fell from me, shunned me, banned me, held my lore
For spells accurst, unhallowed, backward read,
Fell from me, shunned me, banned me, held my lore
For spells accurst, unhallowed, backward read,
“I was God's Priest, his Prophet evermore.
Hast thou no other blessing, Father, say?”
And with that cry of olden anguish sore
Hast thou no other blessing, Father, say?”
And with that cry of olden anguish sore
A silence fell; then saw I far astray
A wildered, wearied child, that in a wood
'Mid gathering darkness darkly seemed to pray,
A wildered, wearied child, that in a wood
'Mid gathering darkness darkly seemed to pray,
Saying “Our Father!” dimly understood,
For charm or blessing, ere he grieving slept.
While from a kingly heart, upon the road
For charm or blessing, ere he grieving slept.
While from a kingly heart, upon the road
That brake, went up an awful voice that wept
And pleaded, “Father, do not Thou forsake!”
And earth was still and heaven its silence kept.
And pleaded, “Father, do not Thou forsake!”
And earth was still and heaven its silence kept.
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