A Metrical History of England :: :: University of Virginia Library

A Metrical History of England

Or, Recollections, in Rhyme, Of some of the most prominent Features in our National Chronology, from the Landing of Julius Caesar to the Commencement of the Regency, in 1812. In Two Volumes ... By Thomas Dibdin

Dibdin, Thomas (1771-1841)

II.

RICHARD III. surnamed CROOKBACK.

10.

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“The only genius of the Line of Stewart.”
Horace Walpole.

“Who never said a foolish thing,
“Nor ever did a wise one.”
Rochester.

“Few men put on the appearance of sincerity better, and in which so much artifice was usually hid; that, in conclusion, he could deceive none, for all were mistrustful of him. He had great vices, but scarcely any virtues to correct them.” Bishop Burnet.

“Let pedants urge their learned strife
“To teach dull mortals what is life:
“Life's a jest—and all things shew it;
“So said Charles, so said the Poet;
“Then live to laugh, since life's a jest,
“Who laughs the most enjoys it best.”
Mark Lonsdale.

“Charl'y lov'd good ale and wine,
“And Charl'y lov'd good brandy;
“And Charl'y lov'd a pretty girl”—
Old Ballad.

“Already quench'd sedition's brand,
“And zeal, which burnt it, only warms the land.”
Dryden.

CHARLES THE SECOND.

O be joyful! let's sing, since hypocrisy's hood
Has been pluck'd from their saintships so dev'lish good;

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Who with puritan modesty pilfer'd the crown,
But whose stiff-neck'd nobility now must bow down.
Derry down.

The semblance of piety caus'd ev'ry evil,
In a war that look'd much more religious than civil,
Presbyterians and Papists alike draw the sword,
'Till Protestant Charles by a Monk was restored.
Derry down.

In that Court where devotion of late was a trade,
Where round headed rumps in the market-place play'd;
Now the arts and the loves and the graces unite,
To make formal extremes grow extremely polite.
Derry down.

Charles's beauties you've heard of, I'll venture to say,
Unequall'd by any, (but those of our day);
I mean the dear girls who surrounded his throne,
For of personal beauty he'd none of his own.
Derry down.

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Now Rochester's Muse running riot apace,
Indecency clothed so, with talents' best grace;
That whether he wish'd us to reckon each line
More brilliant or beastly, 'tis hard to define.
Derry down.

By wedlock to royalty closely allied,
Shines Clarendon, conscience still taking for guide,
Of honest intentions who truly may boast,
And with most spirit wrote when his theme was a ghost.
Derry down.

Now Cowley wrote wit, which a thousand shapes bears,
“Yet comely in each of the thousand appears;”
And Shaftebsury placed at the helm of the state,
Liv'd when Butler's Muse found admirers too late.
Derry down.

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We'd wars with the French, and we'd wars with the Dutch,
With France very little, with Holland too much;
Van Tromp and De Ruyter in each left a name,
With Rupert and Sandwich coeval in fame.
Derry down.

Some genuine plots on their authors were fixt,
With plots to invent plots, most curiously mixt;
For Dangerfield, Bedloe and Oates found a Tongue,
To affirm half the natives deserv'd to be hung.
Derry down.

“Shaftesbury,” said Charles, “thou art certainly the greatest rogue in England.” His Lordship replied, “Of a Subject perhaps I am, Sir.”

“He ask'd for bread and he received a stone,” as the poverty he suffer'd while living, and his monument when dead conjointly testify.

Dr. Tongue.

[“And Dryden, in immortal strain]

“And Dryden, in immortal strain,
“Had raised the “table round” again:
“But that a ribbald King and Court
“Bade him toil on to make them sport,
“Demanded for their niggard pay,
“Fit for their souls, a looser lay,
“Licentious satire, song and play.”

Walter Scott.

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[How shall we here pursue th' unpolish'd strain]

How shall we here pursue th' unpolish'd strain,
That labours to describe a motley reign?
Who shall pourtray the horrors of that year,
Which saw death-dealing Pestilence appear?
When London's guardianGenius droop'd his head,
To mourn o'er countless crouds untimely dead?
Or who shall paint the all-devouring flame,
Which left the capital an empty name?
While Britain thus was humbled to the dust,
Two foes were added, Discord and Distrust;
More fell than recent pestilence or fire,
Came plague of party and religious ire:
Witness that “Shaft which pointing to the skies,”
Like a tall bully, lifts the head and lies;
Be it remember'd, a momentous fact,
This reign produced the Habeas Corpus Act.
And, much less creditable to the state,
(But we must bad and good alike relate),
Dunkirk to France disgracefully was sold,
For some four hundred thousand pounds in gold;

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The kingdom's good thus lavish to support
The enervating vices of the court.
Cromwell and his most hypocritic crew,
('Tis fit the devil should receive his due),
Altho' subversive of domestic law,
Still kept our foreign enemies in awe;
While Charles by stern adversity untaught,
Bought folly,—and we paid for what he bought.
At Charles's death a strange suspicion rose,
That poison brought his being to a close;
His quondam friends enquiry seem to shun,
In haste to bow before the rising sun.
No splendid rites the monarch's corpse await,
Befitting Charles's rank and England's state;
Coldly to earth consigning his remains,
His brother mourns,—I mean his brother reigns.
'Twou'd ask a larger field and better brains
To give more samples of the British muse,
Whose works are extant,—read 'em if you chuse;

137

While with an humble hope to pleasure thos
Who wou'd the ages current style peruse,
Two subjects I'll select of common prose;
Subjects which might a Milton's pen inspire,
The dreadful Plague and swift succeeding Firf.

The Reign of Charles II. which some preposterously represent as our augustan age, retarded the progress of polite literature, and the immeasurable licentiousness indulged, or rather applauded at Court, was more destructive to the refined arts, than even the Court nonsense and enthusiasm of the preceding period. Hume.

Pope.

There were apparent suspicions of his having been poisoned, but, I must add, I never heard any laid those suspicions on his Brother. Bishop Burnet's History of his own Times.

The King's body was indecently neglected: his funeral was very mean; he did not lie in state; no mourning was given; and the expence of it was not equal to what an ordinary nobleman's funeral will rise to. Ibid.