The second part of the honest whore, with the hvmors of the Patient Man, the Impatient Wife the Honest Whore, perswaded by strong Arguments to turne Curtizan againe : her braue refuting those Arguments. And lastly, the Comicall Passages of an Italian Bridewell, where the Scaene ends |
 | 1. |
 | The second part of the honest whore, with the hvmors of the Patient Man, the Impatient Wife |  |
Bel.
How now, what ayles your Master?
Orl.
Has taken a yonger brothers purge, forsooth, and
that workes with him.
Where is his Cloake and Rapier?
Orl.
He has giuen vp his Cloake, and his Rapier is bound
to the Peace: If you looke a little higher, you may see that
another hath entred into hatband for him too. Sixe and
foure haue put him into this sweat.
Bel.
Where's all his money?
Orl.
'Tis put ouer by exchange: his doublet was going to
be translated, but for me: if any man would ha lent but
halfe a ducket on his beard, the haire of it had stuft a paire
of breeches by this time; I had but one poore penny, and
that I was glad to niggle out, and buy a holly-wand to grace
him thorow the streete. As hap was, his bootes were on, and
then I dustied, to make people thinke he had beene riding,
and I had runne by him.
Bell.
Oh me, how does my sweet Matheo?
Mat.
Oh Rogue, of what deuilish stuffe are these Dice
made off? of the parings of the Deuils cornes of his toes,
that they runne thus damnably.
Bel.
I prethee vex not.
Mat.
If any handy-crafts man was euer suffred to keep
shop in hell, it will be a Dice-maker; he's able to vndoe
more soules then the Deuill; I plaid with mine owne Dice,
yet lost. Ha you any money?
Bel.
Las I ha none.
Mat.
Must haue money, must haue some, must haue a
Cloake, and Rapier, and things: will you goe set your limetwigs,
and get me some birds, some money?
Bel.
What limetwigs should I set?
Mat.
You will not then? Must haue cash and pictures:
doe ye heare, (frailty) shall I walke in a Plimouth Cloake,
(that's to say) like a rogue, in my hose and doublet, and a
crabtree cudgell in my hand, and you swimme in your Sattins?
must haue money, come.
Orl.
Is't bed-time, Master, that you vndo my Mistris?
Bel.
Vndoe me? Yes, yes, at these riflings
I haue beene too often.
Mat.
Helpe to flea, Pacheco.
Fleaing call you it?
Mat.
Ile pawne you by'th Lord, to your very eye-browes.
Bel.
With all my heart, since heauen will haue me poore,
As good be drown'd at sea, as drown'd at shore.
Orl.
Why heare you, sir? yfaith doe not make away her
Gowne.
Mat.
Oh it's Summer, it's Summer; your onely fashion
for a woman now, is to be light, to be light.
Orl.
Why, pray sir, employ some of that money you haue
of mine.
Mat.
Thine? Ile starue first, Ile beg first; when I touch a
penny of that, let these fingers ends rot.
Orl.
So they may, for that's past touching. I saw my
twenty pounds flye hie.
Mat.
Knowest thou neuer a damn'd Broker about the
Citty?
Orl.
Damn'd Broker? yes, fiue hundred.
Mat.
The Gowne stood me in aboue twenty Duckets,
borrow ten of it, cannot liue without siluer.
Orl.
Ile make what I can of it, sir, Ile be your Broker,
But not your damb'd broker: Oh thou scuruy knaue,
What makes a wife turne whore, but such a slaue?
Exit.
Mat.
How now little chicke, what aylest, weeping
For a handfull of Taylors shreds? pox on them, are there
not silkes enow at Mercers?
Bel.
I care not for gay feathers, I.
Mat.
What doest care for then? why doest grieue?
Bel.
Why doe I grieue? A thousand sorrowes strike
At one poore heart, and yet it liues. Matheo,
Thou art a Gamester, prethee throw at all,
Set all vpon one cast, we kneele and pray,
And struggle for life, yet must be cast away.
Meet misery quickly then, split all, sell all,
And when thou hast sold all, spend it, but I beseech thee
Build not thy mind on me to coyne thee more,
To get it wouldst thou haue me play the whore?
Mat.
'Twas your profession before I married you.
Vmh? it was indeed: if all men should be branded
For sinnes long since laid vp, who could be saued?
The Quarter day's at hand, how will you doe
To pay the Rent, Matheo?
Mat.
Why? doe as all of our occupation doe against
Quarter daies; breake vp house, remoue, shift your lodgings,
pox a your Quarters.
| The second part of the honest whore, with the hvmors of the Patient Man, the Impatient Wife | |