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The three tours of Doctor Syntax

In search of 1. The picturesque, 2. Of consolation, 3. Of a wife. The text complete. [By William Combe] With four illustrations

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He trotted off, and ere the ray Of parting Phœbus clos'd the day,
He had arriv'd in cleric state, At Stirrup-Hall's old fashion'd gate.
Pat quickly made the bell resound, That echoed all the court around:
Nor was it long before the Knight, In all due form appear'd in sight,
With “Glad to see you, how d'ye do? I take this very kind of you:
And all within my friendly power, You may command at any hour.
—'Tis well known what my life has been,
What my experienc'd mind has seen:
I've wrought my policy so nice, That all come here to ask advice,
And, if your wish is to receive it,
You know who is prepar'd to give it.”
They enter'd—when the talk began, And the long conversation ran,
How the superior, leading, powers
Employ'd or misemploy'd their hours;
Who at the nation's helm preside; What policy our statesmen guide:
That gross corruption sways mankind,
And int'rest base perverts the mind:
How bribes have blinded common sense,
Foil'd reason, truth and eloquence:
That industry the state maintains;
That honest toil and honest gains

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Our fathers rais'd to power and fame;
That virtue boldly scoffs at shame,
And all, in selfish ends pursuing, But scramble for the public ruin.
—At length Sir Stately condescends
To talk of neighbours and of friends;
The hist'ry of the County Quorum,
And what nice cases come before 'em;
While from his known superior skill
They all submit them to his will.
“I've heard,” he added, “what has past
Since I beheld your Rev'rence last.
I'm told that you have lost your wife,
Who gave such comfort to your life:
And here, perhaps, you're come to know
My thoughts of what you ought to do:
Whether your grief at once to smother,
You should look round and get another,
Or on one pillow lay your head, And rest you in a widow'd bed:
On that important point, I pray, Hear what Sir Stately has to say.
You well may take my sage advice,
For, Doctor, I've been married twice;
And though to own it I am loth, I've had but bad success with both.