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The Poetical Works of James Thomson

The City of Dreadful Night: By James Thomson ("B. V."): Edited by Bertram Dobell: With a Memoir of the Author: In two volumes

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XVI.

As one who in the morning-shine
Reels homeward, shameful, wan, adust,
From orgies wild with fiery wine
And reckless sin and brutish lust:

173

And sees a doorway open wide,
And then the grand Cathedral space;
And hurries in to crouch and hide
His trembling frame, his branded face.
The organ-thunders surge and roll
And thrill the heights of branching stone;
They shake his mind, they crush his soul,
His heart knells to them with a moan:
He hears the voice of holy prayer,
The chanting of the fervent hymn;
They pierce his depths of sick despair,
He trembles more, his eyes are dim.
He sees the world-wide morning flame
Through windows where in glory shine
The saints who fought and overcame,
The martyrs who made death divine:
He sees pure women bent in prayer,
Communing low with God above:—
Too pure! what right has he to share
Their silent feast of sacred love?
How can he join the songs of praise?
His throat is parched, his brain is wild:
How dare he seek the Father's gaze,
Thus hopeless, loveless, and defiled?

174

How taint the pureness—though he yearn
To join such fellowship for aye? . . .
He creeps out pale—May he return
Some time when he shall dare to stay!
As he within that holy fane,
Was I upon that solemn shore;
One murky cloud, one spoiling stain,
One jarring note,—all these and more:
A Spectre from the wicked Past,
Familiar with the buried years;
The joys that fade, the griefs that last,
The baffled hopes, the constant fears;
The fair, fair dawn of many a day
That sinks in storm-clouds red and wild;
The souls that in their huts of clay
Are crushed and buried, all defiled;
The Lusts that rage like savage steeds,
While Will with reinless hand sleeps on,
And drunken Thought but goads their speeds,—
Then one mad plunge, and all is gone;
The Moods that strew palm-branches now
And with Hosannas fill the sky,
Then shortly crown with thorns the brow
And mock and scourge and crucify;

175

The error, guile and infamy,
The waste of foul and bloody strife,
The unforeseen catastrophe,
That make the doleful drama, Life.
Ah, what had I to do with these
Young lovely souls serene and clear,
Awaking up by fine degrees
To life unsullied as its sphere?
The Spectre that has roamed forlorn,
Sin-restless, through the sombre night,
Must creep to its old grave at morn,
Nor blot the world of life and light.