 | Neglected Virtue : or, the Vnhappy Conquerour |  |
SCENE I.
Enter Bretton, Curio, Ariene, and Servants.Bret.
Gone! Why 'tis impossible, she cou'd not creep out at
the Key-Hole, sure; Is she a thing invisible; Gone, and
not know it?
Cur.
You amaze your Servants.
Bret.
Some Rogue or other has watched her Hour of Itching,
and claw'd her, claw'd her, do you mind me? Some Rascal, I'll
warrant, that I foster up.
Cur.
They are all here, Sir.
Brit.
Let 'em be where they will, they're all Rascals, Sir; and by
this Hand, I'll hang 'em all.
Cur.
Deal calmly; you will not give 'em time to answer.
Bret.
I'll choak 'em, famish 'em; what say you, Wag-tail? you
knew her Mind, you were of Council with her; Let me know
where she is.
Cur.
Ask with Discretion.
Bret.
Discretion! Hang Discretion: Pox you, confound you,
damn you all. Hussy, let me know where she is.
Ari.
Would you know of me, Sir?
Bret.
Of you, Sir! Ay of you, Sir: Why, what are you, Sir?
Ari.
Your Niece, an't like your Worship.
A Bawd, an't like your Worship; a Lady fairy, to oyle the
Doors a Nights, that they may open without squeeking.
Ari.
'Tis very well, Sir.
Bret.
You lye, 'tis damnable ill, Sir: Hearky', will you confess yet?
Ari.
If I were guilty, I'd be hang'd first: Is this an Age to confess in?
Bret.
Tell me the Truth, Ariene, and as I live I'll give thee a new
Petticoat.
Ari.
If you'd give me ten, I would not tell you. A Petticoat!
I'd have you know, Sir, Truths are now a-days at a higher Price,
than I perceive you are aware of.
Cur.
Come, Cousin, deal modestly.
Ari.
Why, I don't pluck my Cloaths.
Bret.
What say you, Sirrah, you, and you, are you all dumb?
Port.
I saw her last Night, an't shall like your Worship.
Bret.
Did you so, an't shall like your Worship? Where lay she?
who lay with her?
Port.
In truth, not I, Sir; I lay with my Fellow Frederick, in the
Flea-Chamber.
Ari.
I left her by her self in her own Closet; and there I thought
she had slept.
Bret.
Were all the Doors locked?
Port.
All mine.
Serv.
And mine; she cou'd not get out that way, unless she leap'd
the Wall; and I am sure that's higher than any Woman's Courage
dares venture at.
Bret.
Come, come, I say once more, Hussy, you must know.
Ari.
Why then, Sir, I'll tell you what I know.
Bret.
I, do, that's my Ari.
Ari.
In the the first place, I believe she's gone, because you can't
find her. In the second, I believe she's weary of your Tyranny, and
therefore gone; and in the third place, I believe she's in Love,
where you have no good Liking; and in the fourth place, If I were
she, I'd see you hang'd before I'd come agen.
Bret.
Was there ever so much Impudence in Woman! Get you
out my Doors.
Ari.
Ay, with all my Heart; if your House was Gold, and she
not in it, I should count it nothing but a Cage to whistle in.
If she be above ground I will have her.
Ari.
I'd live in a Coal-pit then, if I were she.
Bret.
Go search the House once more, all Corners where 'tis possible
she may go out: If I do find your Tricks—
Ari.
I care not what you find, so you don't find her.
[Ex. Serv.
Enter Castilio Junior.
Cast.
Why, how now, Father-in-law, what, I hope you han't got a
sham Fit of the Apoplexy too: Look, look, how he struts about, like
a new-made Gentleman-Usher. My Lord, your Lordships most humble
Servant; pray how does Miss Wife do?
Bret.
Oh, Son-in-law, she's quite undone.
Cast.
Why, she is not married yet, is she?
Bret.
Nay Heaven knows, she may be for ought I know; she is
stoln out of the House, and is gone, Heaven knows whither.
Cast.
Humph—Now do I begin to smell out my Fathers Apoplectick
Fit; I perceive I was not shamm'd off so for nothing, Look ye,
Father that shou'd have been, if your Daughter be gone, there's a Witch
at your Elbow knows what Wind will fetch her back again,
Ari.
Meaning me, Sweet Sir?
Cast.
Yes, you, sweet Lady, pray when went the Gentleman away
that was so kind to bring me the News of my Fathers being given over
by his Physicians. A Plague of his Message, I'm sure he procur'd
me a good drubbing.
Ari.
He went just after you, Forsooth.
Bret.
How! A Man was there! a Man with her!
Ari.
O, yes, Unkle, the prettiest, sweetest, good humoredst Gentleman
I ever saw in all my life.
Bret.
And how got he in? tell me.
Ari.
I let him in, Forsooth.
Bret.
And who was it? tell me, my dear Ariene, tell me, and I
protest I'll give thee new Cloaths from top to bottom.
Ari.
I'll rather turn Adamite, and bring Fig Leaves into fashion
again.
Bret.
'Slife, I could find in my Heart to murder the jade.
Cast.
If I an't mistaken, my Lord, they call him, Ly, Ly, Ly,
something.
Bret.
Lycastes.
The same, by Jupiter.
Bret.
Oh! Rogue, Dog, Oh! Villain, he has been hankering after
her above this half year.
How now, what news? is she i'th'House?
Por.
I'm sure she's not i't'Cellar; for look ye, Sir, if she had been
i't' cellar—
Bert.
I'm sure thou hast been there.
Port.
Yes truly, Sir; and I carry'd the matter very swimmingly;
I search'd every piece of Wine, yes sure, Sir, every Terse that could
but testifie, and I drew hard to bolt her out.
Bert.
Away with him, fling him into the Hay-loft. Go Rascals,
careless Dogs, get me my Sword, my Pistols, and arm your selves
quickly; I'll to that Rascal's House, I'm sure she's rousled there.
Come, Castillio, will you accompany me?
Cast.
Ay, with all my Heart, Sir.
Bret.
And d'ye hear, Hussey, get you to your Chamber, and
let me find you at my return,—or—
[Exit Bret. Cast. and Servants.
Ari.
Wipe your Beard, Unkle, the Effects of your Anger hangs
upon't. Why what a little ill-natur'd Titt was this to steal away
without my Knowledge. Well, I'm resolv'd I'll follow her, and
be an eternal Plague to this old Devil of a Father of hers: Sure
Lycastes, will have Wit enough to conceal her; thither I'm certain
she's gone. Well, I'll to my Chamber, and study how to make
my escape unknown. I'll teach his anger to dispute with Women.
[Exit.
| Neglected Virtue : or, the Vnhappy Conquerour | |