University of Virginia Library


274

THE LADY'S CONFESSION.

With a veil o'er her eyes and her bosom all bare,
Lady Mary kneel'd down, whilst the tears of despair
Down her cheeks and round breasts like hillocks of snow,
Descended in rills to the valley below.
Derry down, down, &c.
“Such tears of remorse, my fair penitent child,
Flow seldom in vain,” said the Frier and smiled:
“I'll ensure you quite through, you have nothing to dread,
From the sole of your foot to the hair of your head.
Derry down, &c.
Though he neither minds bell, book, and candle, nor grate,
And is constantly tempting you early and late,
The tempter of Adam will at last, I believe,
Be too cunning and strong for the tempter of Eve.
Derry down, &c.

275

All the devil can do with his pricking and spurring
Is to set you a longing and set you a stirring,
Like boys o'er an orchard half dropping, half sticking,
From longing you soon fall to handling and picking.
Derry down, &c.
And when you have handled and pick'd what you will,
From the ladies at court to the lass of the mill,
You come here and repent with great sorrow and shame,
And the devil must go back like a fool as he came.
Derry down, &c.
The devil can easily trip up your heels;
But what then? You are all such a parcel of eels,
When your sins lie upon you, you'll every one
Riggle out like an eel that lies under a stone.
Derry down, &c.
Then take courage, dear daughter, unburthen your mind,
And be sure, above all, you leave nothing behind;

276

'Tis no shame to discover what is death to conceal,
For your doctor must visit the parts he must heal.”
Derry down, &c.
“In you, my good father and heavenly guide,
I put my whole trust,” the fair lady replied,
“And will therefore premise, with most scrupulous truth,
A few of the sins I concealed in my youth.
Derry down, &c.
I was taught at sixteen, by a masculine nun,
Till I learnt, from a pistol, to handle a gun;
And then I encounter'd a frier from Furne's
That used to serve her and the abbess by turns.
Derry down, &c.
No Flanderkin monk, since good monks were begot,
Could furnish more game for an abbess's pot;
But how the nun came by such luck should be known,
You must know that the abbess was deaf as a stone.
Derry down, &c.

277

Though as deaf as a stone, yet so sound and so nice,
Was her judgement, when steer'd by the frier's advice,
She consign'd to my nun, as the flower of the flock,
The keys of St. Peter, to open and lock.
Derry down, &c.
Thus my nun watch'd the signals, and had for her pains,
Both the abbess's leavings, and other small gains;
For the abbess to balance and make accounts fair,
Put all the young novices under her care.
Derry down, &c.
Now, whether in Sappho 'twas passion or whim,
She amused herself better with me than with him;
So we struck up a bargain that pleased us all three,
And I stuck to the frier, and she stuck to me.
Derry down, &c,
Like a filly, quite aukward at first in a manage,
I neither had action or grace in my carriage;

278

But from the first lesson to every new chapter
He found me improve, and I found myself apter.
Derry down, &c.
And thus we went on in a round of delight,
When, to vary the scene, I fell in with a knight,
Who had found a way into my cell like a fairy,
And went out, like a surfeited rat from a dairy.
Derry down, &c.
Between frier and knight, my Lesbian's brother,
I was like to become an unfortunate mother;
But by her assistance and skill I miscarried,
And at last, through her means, to Sir Francis was married.
Derry down, &c.
[OMITTED] [OMITTED] [OMITTED] [OMITTED]
Twas his confessor's trick, 'twas the frier of Flanders,
To whom all the friers on earth are but ganders;

279

Who, to save the knight's soul, set his sister a dreaming,
When 'twas mortgaged so deep it was scarce worth redeeming.
Derry down, &c.
Since the time that the frier has quitted this quarter
I have sometimes had luck and sometimes caught a Tartar;
But I never yet played with a squire or a knight
That could play with such temper and lose the whole night.”
Derry down, &c.
I know, said the frier, they all are slack mettled,
And you'll always be changing and always unsettled,
Instead of one sin you'll have four sins to score,
And your profits and income be less than before.
Derry down, &c.
The sins of your youth are forgiven and sunk,
From the first of the nun to the last of the monk;

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But there's nothing can take out a burn like the fire,
Nor the heat a monk leaves but the heat of a frier.
Derry down, &c.
I soon could convince you my counsel is right;
Said my lady, “Good father, convince me to-night,
Do but come to the door of our garden at ten.”
“Adieu,” said the frier, “fair daughter, till then.”
Derry down, down, down, derry down.