October 7.—
I have just received a letter
from lady V—. She tells me she sent
twice to invite Mr. Arnold to dine with
them, in order, if possible, to lead him
into a conversation, by which they hoped,
in some measure, to have cleared my innocence,
as my lord could take upon him
to justify Mr. Faulkland; but he declined
coming, not knowing, perhaps, that Mr.
Faulkland was absent from V—hall. She
said, her lord had gone to South-park;
but neither Mr. Arnold was not at home,
or denied himself. My lady adds, 'It
is a delicate affair to interpose in; yet
would I have ventured to have wrote to
your husband, if I had been sure that you
had no objection to my telling him, that
you had made me privy to the cause of
your parting: 'tis plain, by his avoiding
us, it is a subject he does not care
to come to an explanation upon. Let
me have your sentiments, and I will act
accordingly.'
I shall answer lady V—'s letter directly,
and beg of her to leave the matter as it is.
Mrs. Gerrarde's testimony will have more
weight than all my good lord or lady
could urge in my favour: besides, they
are not furnished with sufficient weapons
to combat against such an enemy: they
know nothing of Miss Burchell's story;
my regard to her character prevented me
from giving my lady this specimen of her
aunt's baseness. I suppose the same reason
may have closed Mr. Faulkland's lips on
that subject: so that they have nothing to
allege against Mrs. Gerrarde, which would
help to invalidate her testimony with regard
to Mr. Faulkland and me. Mr.
Arnold, indeed, knows that she has forfeited
her pretensions to modesty; but the
delusion of self-love blinds a man in those
cases; and he can believe, that
truth,
sincerity, and
justice, inhabit the bosom of
her, whose passion for
him alone has caused
a deviation from chastity.
I cannot think of exposing the poor
Miss Burchell by giving up her secret.
Though it might contribute to clear me,
by turning Mr. Arnold's suspicions on
Mrs. Gerrarde, yet would she have great
reason to resent it; more especially as she
is now, by a blameless life, endeavouring
to blot out the memory of her fault.
Though my lady V— is very prudent,
her zeal for me, and my lord's good-natured earnestness in my cause, might
render them unguarded on the occasion;
and should they attempt to make use of
this secret, in order to criminate Mrs.
Gerrarde, it might at the same time,
bring malicious censures both on Miss
Burchell and Mr. Faulkland.
I think, upon the whole, my mother is
the properest person to mediate on this
nice occasion. When Mr. Arnold comes
to town; she can, with due tenderness to
the young lady, disclose the whole affair
to him. The knowledge of this black
part of Mrs. Gerrarde's character, joined
to her arguments, may perhaps have some
weight; though, to tell you the secret
bodings of my heart, I expect not much
from this. I have lost my husband's love;
Mrs. Gerrarde possesses it all; and who
knows whether he even wishes to lose his
pretence for abandoning an unhappy wife.
I wish, however, Mr. Faulkland were returned
to V—hall: should Mr. Arnold
know of his absence at this juncture, he
might imagine possibly he was gone in
quest of me.
