Scripscrapologia or, Collins's Doggerel Dish Of All Sorts. Consisting of Songs Adapted to familiar Tunes, And which may be sung without the Chaunterpipe of an Italian Warbler, or the ravishing Accompaniments of Tweedle-Dum or Tweedle-Dee. Particularly those which have been most applauded in the author's once popular performance, call'd, The Brush. The Gallimaufry garnished with a variety of comic tales, quaint epigrams, whimsical epitaphs, &c. &c. [by John Collins] |
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 | Scripscrapologia |  |
THE GROWTH OF A LIE:
OR, THE CATEATER NEW DRESS'D! A SONG.
As Bunbury's Print informs our Eyes,
How swift, when broach'd a Falsehood flies,
My sing song Sketch but aims to shew,
How fast, when hatch'd, a Lie will grow.
How swift, when broach'd a Falsehood flies,
My sing song Sketch but aims to shew,
How fast, when hatch'd, a Lie will grow.
Which, like a Bell, rings through the Throng
Dong ding, Ding dong, Dong ding Dong!
Dong ding, Ding dong, Dong ding Dong!
Poor Bob, with Laboring near done up,
On humble Fare sits down to sup,
And thinks no Harm, (his Taste to please,)
For once to toast his Bread and Cheese,
On humble Fare sits down to sup,
And thinks no Harm, (his Taste to please,)
For once to toast his Bread and Cheese,
But mark what Lies, &c.
160
Says Bob, next Morn, to his Brother Joe,
I'm as hung'ry now as a carrion Crow,
Though I,—with a swinging Appetite,
A fine Welch Rabbit eat last Night.
I'm as hung'ry now as a carrion Crow,
Though I,—with a swinging Appetite,
A fine Welch Rabbit eat last Night.
When, lo what Lies, &c.
Joe swore to Jack, for the Dog was drole,
That Bob had eat up a Rabbit whole,
And Jack told Tom, which made him stare,
Instead of a Rabbit, a fine fat Hare.
That Bob had eat up a Rabbit whole,
And Jack told Tom, which made him stare,
Instead of a Rabbit, a fine fat Hare.
So Lies like Bells, &c.
Then Tom told Dick, by the Way of Chat,
That Bob for Supper had eat a Cat,
And it soon was buzz'd from Hive to Hive,
That the Beast had swallow'd the Cat alive!
That Bob for Supper had eat a Cat,
And it soon was buzz'd from Hive to Hive,
That the Beast had swallow'd the Cat alive!
Thus Lies, like Bells, &c.
But as Scandal's Tools with Slander burn,
A single Cat would not serve their Turn,
For the Tale went round with Great and Small,
That he cramm'd down Two with their Skins and all!
A single Cat would not serve their Turn,
For the Tale went round with Great and Small,
That he cramm'd down Two with their Skins and all!
So Lies, like Bells, &c.
As a Goose, we know, may be made a Swan,
Then another Cat was soon tack'd on,
And Men and Maids, and brawling Brats,
Said, the Monster had eat up Three live Cats!
Then another Cat was soon tack'd on,
And Men and Maids, and brawling Brats,
Said, the Monster had eat up Three live Cats!
Thus Lies, like Bells, &c.
Now at such a Report what a Man must feel,
That he gobbled up, at a single Meal,
Three Cats alive, with the greatest Ease,
Instead of a Slice of Bread and Cheese!
That he gobbled up, at a single Meal,
Three Cats alive, with the greatest Ease,
Instead of a Slice of Bread and Cheese!
And hear such Lies, &c.
161
By a Flood, the Tide will swell and flow,
And a Mountain swells by a Fall of Snow;
The Clouds will swell, too, as they fly,
But Nothing swells like a bouncing Lie!
And a Mountain swells by a Fall of Snow;
The Clouds will swell, too, as they fly,
But Nothing swells like a bouncing Lie!
Which, like a Bell, rings through the Throng,
Dong ding, Ding dong, Dong ding dong!
Dong ding, Ding dong, Dong ding dong!
| Scripscrapologia | |