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Chrestoleros

Seuen bookes of Epigrames written by T. B. [i.e. Thomas Bastard]

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Liber Quartus.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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77

Liber Quartus.

Epigr. 1. Ad Librum suum.

Lye not my booke for that were wickednes,
Be not too idle, idle though thou be.
Eschewe scurrilitie and wantonnesse.
Temper with little mirth, more grauity.
Rayle not at any least thy friends forsake thee.
In earnest cause of writing shew thy witt.
Touch none at all that no man may mistake thee.
But speake the best, that all may like of it.
If any aske thee what I doe professe,
Say that, of which thou art the idlenesse.

78

Epigr. 2. Ad Do. Mountioy.

Mountioy , among the labours of my pen,
Which my glad muse aspireth to present,
To thee as worthiest of all other men,
Of thee as patron and high president,
If any had, these had bin worthy best.
But since all are, these are vnworthy least.

Epigr. 3. Ad Librum suum.

My booke, some handes in Oxford wil thee take,
And beare thee home, and louingly respect thee
And entertaine thee for thy masters sake:
And for thy masters sake some will reiect thee.
But to my faithfull friendes commend I thee.
And to mine enemies, commend thou me.

79

Epigr. 4. Ad vtrangue Academiam.

Ye famous sister Vniuersities,
Oxford and Cambridge, whence proceeds your hate?
Brothers rare concord do ye imitate,
Each greeting each with mutuall iniuries?
Brothers fall out and quarrell I confesse,
But sisters loue; for it becomes you lesse.

Epigr. 5. Ad easdem.

VVhy striue ye sisters for antiquitie?
Can not your present honour you suffice?
VVhy striue ye sisters for that vanitie.
VVhich if ye sawe as twas, you would despise?
You must make loue: loue is your surest hold,
Others must honour you and make you olde.

80

Epigr. 6. De sua Clepsydræ.

Setting mine howre glasse for a witnesse by
To measure studie as the time did fly:
A lingring muse posseste my thinking brayne:
My minde was reaching, but in such a veyne,
As if my thoughtes by thinking brought a sleepe,
Winglesse & footelesse, now like snailes did creepe,
I eyde my glasse, but he so fast did ronne.
That ere I had begonne, the howre was donne.
The creeping sandes with speedy pace were flitt,
Before one reason crept out of my witt.
When I stoode still I sawe how time did fly.
When my wits ranne, time ranne, more fast then I,
Stay heere, ile change the course, let study passe
And let time study while I am the glasse.
What touch ye sands? are little mites so fleete?
Can bodies ronne so swift which haue no feete?

81

And can ye tomble time so fast away?
Then farewell howers, I'le study by the day.

Epigr. 7.

Ovr fathers did but vse the world before.
And hauing vsde did leaue the same to vs.
We spill what euer resteth of their store.
What can our heyres inherit but our curse?
For we haue suckt the sweete and sappe away,
And sowd consumption in the fruitfull ground:
The woods and forests cladd in rich aray,
With nakednesse and baldnesse we confounde.
We haue defast the lasting monymentes
And caus'd all honour to haue ende with vs:
The holy temples feele our rauishments.
What can our heyres inherit but our curse?
The world must ende, for men are so accurst,
Vnlesse God ende it sooner: they will furst,

82

Epigr. 8. Ad Iohannem VVhitegift, Arch. Cant.

Whitegift , whom gratious honour entertaines.
Welcome as to the yeare the gladsome May,
Welcome as is the morning to the day,
Welcome as sleepe vnto the weary swaynes:
The fayre Elisa white with heauenly praises:
The Gods white Church adorned doth set forth,
The all white meaning and excelling worth:
The vertue white aboue all honour raises.
Yet let my pen present this little storie.
Vnto the endlesse volume of thy glorie.

Epigr. 9. In adorantes reliquias.

Is it a worthy thing to digge vp bones?
To kisse, t'adore the reliques of dead men?

83

Alas how foolish were those sily ones,
Which in times past did nought but burie them?
But they perhaps for stinke did then refraine:
But you doe worse to make them stinke againe.
Yet in the very stinking this is odd.
They stank to men then, now they stinke to God.

Epigr. 10. Comparatio Cranmeri & Mutij.

Like Mutius Cranmer thou diddest burne thine hand
O but I iniure thee thus to compare.
Nothing was like, the fire, the cause, the man.
Yet likest you of all that stored are.
He had a Theatre of men to see
What thou didst represent to Angels eyes.
He burnt his hand to cinders carelesly,
Which thou by burning diddest sacrifice.

84

Thou diddest sowe thine hand into the flame,
Which he consumde and could not reape againe.
Thy loue did quench the burning of the same,
Acting with pleasure what he did with paine.
In him twas wonder that he did presume,
To touch the flame with flesh contaminated.
In thee twas wonder that the fire did burne.
An holy hand to glory consecrated.

Epigr. 11.

Pvblius hath two brothers fowle and cleane.
The fowle is honest, and the cleane a foole:
He in the middest maketh vp the meane,
Sitting in vertues place: so saith our schoole:
Of his extreames neither alowe he can
The cleane foole, nor the filthy honest man.

85

Epigr. 12. De Læto & Bito.

Lætus doth pittie Bitus for his wantes,
And low desires, & meane hopes, & poore fare:
For small house and little houshold plantes.
For his plainnesse, and for his honest care,
Bitus doth pittie Lætus happinesse,
And his great house, sweet friend's & dangers store,
His heedlesse good and steepe presumptuousnesse,
His merry heart and thoughts aspyring more.
Thus each do see into the others woe.
But Bitus is more mercifull of the two.

Epigr. 13.

Indie newe found the Christian faith doth holde,
Reioycing in our heauenly merchandize.
Which we haue chang'd for pretious stones & gold

86

And pearle and feathers, and for Popingyes.
Now are they louing, meeke and vertuous,
Contented, sweetly with poore godlinesse.
Nowe are we saluage, fierce and barbarous,
Rich with the fuell of all wickednesse.
So did Elishaes seruant Gehazye,
With Naamans goold, buy Naamans leprosye.

Epigr. 14.

Rvfus hath spent his gummes and vnderlippe,
Cancelde his face, vndonne his faithfull eyes,
And searde his throate with many a scalding sipp,
Of Ala fortis where his treasure lies.
Onely his nose remaines to comfort him,
Which hath encroacht ore all the partes beside,
Erecting Trophees ore his conquered chinn.
Fayre crested, tall, voluminous and wide.

87

Vnder whose cou'ring his face lyeth low.
Tanquam sub Aiacis clypeo.

Epigr. 15. De lue Mahometica.

When Pan forsooke the mountaines & the rocks,
where he did leade his heards, & his great flocks
And that sweete pipe to which the hils did dance,
Was split a sunder, a most wofull chance.
And the worldes heart was smitten in her brest,
And the bright Sunne, declined in the East.
And the blinde Locustes, crau'de no other light,
Then for their Sunne the black pits smoaking night.
Sodome forsooke her sea, where she lay dead.
And with Gomorrhe all Asia ouerspread.

88

Epigr. 16. Ad Reginam. Elizabetham.

When in thy flowring age thou did'st beginne,
Thy happy reigne, Eliza, blessed Queene.
Then as a flowre thy country gan to spring,
All things as after winter waxed greene:
No riper time shakes of thy flowring yeeres,
Thy greennesse stayes, our budd continueth.
No age in thee or winters face appeares.
And as thou, so thy country florisheth.
As if that greennesse and felicitie,
Thy land did giue, which it receiues from thee.

Epigr. 17.

The Sonn which shines amid the heauē so bright
And guides our eyes to heauen by his light:

89

Will not be gazde on of a fleshly eye:
But blinds that sight which dares to see so hye:
Euen he doth tell vs that heauen doth require,
Far better eyes of them which would see higher.

Epigr. 18. Ad Comitem Essexiæ, de expeditione in Hispaniam.

Being in armes, how did'st thou furiously,
With fire and sword thy trembled hand display
Which did'st become after the victory.
Sweete to the captiues, gentle to the pray?
Teach Spaine, Deurox, as thou hast well begunn
Not to dare fight, but dare to b'ouercome.

Epigr. 19. Ad eundem

Essex bring to Elisa youth and life.
Sing her a sleepe with ioyfull victories.

90

Leaue to her enemies despaire and strife.
Wake them with wofull wars, and fearfull cries.
Of conquering vs how fowly doe they misse.
Which feele our force, and enuy at our blisse.

Epigr. 20.

Sheepe haue eate vp our medows & our downes,
Our corne, our wood, whole villages & townes,
Yea, they haue eate vp many wealthy men,
Besides widowes and Orphane childeren.
Besides our statutes and our iron lawes,
Which they haue swallowed down into their maws.
Till now I thought the prouerbe did but iest,
Which said a blacke sheepe was a biting beast.

91

Epigr. 21.

Mountioy , thy vetue and thy secret woorth,
My lowe enditing seeketh not to raise.
Heres no inuention to set thee forth.
Here is no painted stile, no borrowed phraise.
Yet breathing tables sweetly thee resemble,
And thy fayre image dwels in liuing hearts:
But least succeeding ages should dissemble,
And time obscure the glory of thy partes.
While thou dost liue giue life vnto my pen,
Which when thou dyest will pay it the agen.

Epigr. 22. Ad Lectorem.

Reader, I grant I doe not keepe the lawes,
Of riming in my verse: but I haue cause:
I turne the pleasure of the ende sometimes,
Least he that likes them not should call thē rymes.

92

Epigr. 23. De tribus pucris in fornace ignea.

What were the children Nabucadnessar,
Which walking in the fornace thou did'st see?
Was each an Angel, or an heauenly starre,
Aboue the act of natures soueraigntie?
Were they three wedges of the finest goold,
Which the heauens treasurer doth so desire?
Or had they power to turne the heat to colde?
Were they three Salamanders in the fire?
The flame was martyred with her heat spent,
And the fire suffred for the innocent.

Epigr. 24. Epitaphum Cannis.

Of fighting Cannius here lye the bones,
Which neuer receiued the lye but ones.

93

He thought to auenge him; he drew forth his sword.
He ventured his life vpon a bare word.
Now I say he lyeth, in him the cause is,
Had he tane that lye, he had not tane this.

Epigr. 25

Ovr Water Drake long seas, strange ieopardies,
Farr countries, great attempts haue ouertane.
Hee payde his life there, whence his glory came,
Adorne him India for in thee he lies,
We haue a worthier worthy of our state.
And would not leaue our Water for our Drake.

Epigr. 26.

Indie which so long fearde, now hath our Drake,
Her feare lyes buried in her golden sands.

94

Which we will oft reuisite for his sake,
Till we haue ransomde him out of her handes.
You which will venter for a goolden pray,
Go on braue lads, by Water is your way.

Epigr. 27. In cultum reliquiarum.

To seeke thee in thy Tombe sweete Iesu when,
The women with their oyntment hastened:
Two Angels did appeare, forbidding them
To seeke thee liuing there among the dead.
Did Rome by diuing in the tombes of saintes,
But seeke the liuing whence they now are sled,
Yet might they heare the Angels making plaint.
Seeke not the liuing Rome among the dead.
But to tye holy worshipp to dead bones.
To bowe religion to the wicked trust
Of crosses, reliques, ashes, flickes and stones.

95

To throwe downe liuing men to honour dust:
Is not to seeke, but like Mezentius rather,
To ioyne the liuing and the dead together.

Epigr. 28. Epitap. Richardi Pinuer.

Here lyes Dicke Pinner. O vngentle death,
Why didst thou rob Dick Pinner of his breath
For liuing he by scraping of a pinn:
Made better dust then thou hast made of him.

Epigr. 29. Ad Lectorem.

Reader but halfe my labour is expirde,
And Poet, matter, witt and all are tyrde.
Thrise fiftie labours haue worne out my veyne,
An hundred meanings and an halfe remayne,

96

Heere would I rest were my first worke to doe,
VVere the last at an end, heere would I to.

Epigr. 30.

Melus was taught to speake, to read, to write.
Yet clerkly sooth he can do none of these.
He learned Logicke and Arithmetique.
Yet neither brauls not ciphers worth a peaze.
The musicke schoole did teach him her sweet art.
He dealt with Rhetorique and Astrologie.
Yet nether can he chaunt it for his part,
Ne can he tell a tale, or prophesie,
And yet he rides as scholerlike (tis thought)
As neuer any: yet was neuer taught.

97

Epigr. 31. De Francisco Walsingham & Philppo Sidneio Equit.

Sir Francis and Sir Philip, haue no Toombe,
Worthy of all the honour that may be.
And yet they lye not so for want of roome,
Or want of loue in their posteritie.
Who would from liuing hearts vntombe such ones,
To bury vnder a fewe marble stones?
Vertue dyes not, her tombe we neede not raise,
Let thē trust tombs which haue outliu'd their praise.

Epigr. 32.

When I beholde with deepe astonishment,
To famous Westminster how there resorte,
Liuing in brasse or stony monyment.
The princes and the worthies of all sorte:

98

Doe not I see reformde Nobilitie,
Without contempt or pride, or ostentation?
And looke vpon offenselesse Maiesty,
Naked of pompe or earthly domination?
And howe a play-game of a painted stone,
Contents the quiet now and silent spirites.
Whome all the world which late they stood vpon,
Could not content nor squench their appetites,
Life is a frost of cold felicity.
And death the thawe of all our vanitie.

Epigr. 33.

The first and riper world of men and skill,
Yeeldes to our later time for three inuentions,
Miracolously we write, we saile, we kill,
As neither ancient scroll nor story mentions,

Printe.

The first, hath open'd learnings old conceald,


99

And obscurde artes restored to the light,
The second hiddē countries hath reuealed,

Loade stone.


And sent Christes Ghospell to each liuing wight,
These we commend, but O what needed more.
To teach death more skill then it had before.

Gunns.


Epigr. 34. Ad Iohannem Reynolds

Doe I call iudgement to my foolish rimes,
And rarest art and reading them to viewe,
Reynoldes: Religions Oracle most true.
Mirrour of arte, and Austen of our times?
For loue of these I call thee, which I pray,
That thou in reading these would'st put away.

Epigr. 35.

I sawe a naked corpse spread on the ground,
Ouer the dead I sawe the liuing fight.

100

If euer ought my senses did confound,
Or touch my heart, it was this wofull sight.
To wound the graue, to dare the dead to dye.
To sprinkle life on ashes putrifide.
To weepe with blood, to mourne with villanie,
To looke on death and not be mortifide.
Such funerals if we sustaine to keepe,
I thinke the dead will rise, and for vs weepe.

Epigr. 36.

Chito and Trogus sinn th' extremitie,
Chito of pride, Trogus of gluttonie.
Chito will weare his dinner on his backe.
Trogus will eate his shoes rather then lacke.
Chito hath earthen plate, but golden cuts:
Tragus hath a freize coate, but veluet guts.

101

Epigr. 37. De Gualtero Deurox in expeditione gallica cæso

T'honour and blisse Deurox thou didst aspyre,
By worthy means, though fortune not thy friend
Tooke from thy ioyes, what vertue did desire,
To giue thy life: but paide thee in thine ende.
Onely at this thy country doth repine,
That her reioycing is not ioynde with thine.

Epigr. 38. Ad Lectorem.

Had I my wish contented I should be,
Though nether rich nor better then you see.
For tis nor wealth nor honour that I craue,
But a short life, Reader, and a long graue.

102

Epigr. 39. Ad Henricum Wottonem.

Wotton my little Beere dwels on a hill,
Vnderwhose foot the siluer Trowt doth swim
The Trowt siluer without and goold within,
Bibbing cleere Nectar, which doth aye destill
From Nulams lowe head; there the birds are singing
And there the partiall Sunnne still giues occasion,
To the sweete dewes eternall generation:
There is greene ioy and pleasure euer springing,
O iron age of men, O time of rue.
Shame ye not that all things are goold but you?

Epigr. 40.

My merry exercises of conceipt,
When I was once in a seuerer veyne.

103

Had felt one dash, my fury was so great,
Vp was my pen and scarse could I refraine,
When two or three bespeake which I lik't best,
And for their sakes I pardon'd all the rest.
Finis Libri quarti.