14. CHAPTER XIV
Of the fervent desire of certain devout persons to receive the
Body and Blood of Christ
The Voice of the Disciple
O how great is the abundance of Thy sweetness, O Lord, which Thou
hast laid up for them that fear Thee. When I call to mind some
devout persons who draw nigh to Thy Sacrament, O Lord, with the
deepest devotion and affection, then very often I am confounded
in myself and blush for shame, that I approach Thine altar and
table of Holy Communion so carelessly and coldly, that I remain
so dry and without affection, that I am not wholly kindled with
love before Thee, my God, nor so vehemently drawn and affected as
many devout persons have been, who out of the very earnest desire
of the Communion, and tender affection of heart, could not
refrain from weeping, but as it were with mouth of heart and body
alike panted inwardly after Thee, O God, O Fountain of Life,
having no power to appease or satiate their hunger, save by
receiving Thy Body with all joyfulness and spiritual eagerness.
2. O truly ardent faith of those, becoming a very proof of Thy
Sacred Presence! For they verily know their Lord in the breaking
of bread, whose heart so ardently burneth within them[n175]
when
Jesus walketh with them by the way. Ah me! far from me for the
most part is such love and devotion as this, such vehement love
and ardour. Be merciful unto me, O Jesus, good, sweet, and kind,
and grant unto Thy poor suppliant to feel sometimes, in
Holy
Communion, though it be but a little, the cordial affection of
Thy love, that my faith may grow stronger, my hope in Thy
goodness increase, and my charity, once kindled within me by the
tasting of the heavenly manna, may never fail.
3. But Thy mercy is able even to grant me the grace which I long
for, and to visit me most tenderly with the spirit of fervour
when the day of Thy good pleasure shall come. For, although I
burn not with desire so vehement as theirs who are specially
devout towards Thee, yet, through Thy grace, I have a desire
after that greatly inflamed desire, praying and desiring to be
made partaker with all those who so fervently love Thee, and to
be numbered among their holy company.