 | The Discreet Princess ; or, the Three Glass Distaffs |  |
Scene Third
—The Garden on the top of the Tower.Enter Babillarda, followed by Richcraft (as old woman).
Babil.
One more step, and you're at the top.
Rich.
I'm glad
To hear it, for my breath's so very bad.
Babil.
Sit down, and take some fresh then—for, no doubt,
You couldn't sing conveniently without.
Rich.
Who was the lady fast asleep below?
Babil.
My eldest sister, Idelfonza.
Rich.
Oh!
But you've another sister, I've been told.
Babil.
Oh, yes, Finetta! Won't she fume and scold,
When she finds—
(Richcraft goes to alcove and leaves basket)
Enter Finetta, followed by Idelfonza dragging a camp stool.
Fin.
Ha! my fears then were too true!
Babil.
(aside)
Oh, my! she's here, and Idelfonza too!
Idel.
Why, Babillarda! who on earth's this stranger?
Fin.
Who let her in?
Babil.
I did, and where's the danger?
Fin.
There's always danger where there's disobedience.
Babil.
Folks shouldn't drive one, then, to such expedients.
Fin.
Your indiscretion will be punished—see
Your distaff's broken!
Babil.
So it is—dear me!
When could I break it?
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When you broke your word.
Babil.
I never gave it, so don't be absurd.
Fin.
Alas, more mischief may be brewing!
Babil.
Stuff!
Don't preach. I've done it, child, and that's enough.
What mischief can this poor old body do,
I should just like to know, to me or you?
I brought her in to wait on us.
Idel.
Delightful!
The thought of waiting on one's self is frightful.
Babil.
Besides she can sing songs, and so amuse me!
If you don't like it, you can go.
Fin.
Excuse me,
I shan't leave you such company alone in.
Babil.
Well, I don't care, if I'm not left my own in.
So sing, good mother, and don't mind her prosing.
Idel.
Yes, do sing! it's so pleasant while one's dozing.
Rich.
What shall I sing? ugh, ugh! I'm rather hoarse.
Babil.
Oh, “the Ratchatcher's Daughter,” dame, of course.
Rich.
D'ye know the song?
Babil.
I know the air—no more.
Rich.
Then you have never heard these words before?
Song—Richcraft—Air, “The Ratcatcher's Daughter.”
Not long ago there lived, somewhere,
A king who had three fair daughters;
But he didn't quite like to leave 'em there,
While he went t'other side of the waters.
The father smelt rats, for he'd often caught flats,
A prowling about his quarters;
So packed up snug, in a sort of stone jug,
Were these purty little Flatcatcher's Darters.
Singing, Doodle dee, doodle dum,
Didum doodle da.
Chorus, Ladies—Doodle dee, &c.
A king who had three fair daughters;
But he didn't quite like to leave 'em there,
While he went t'other side of the waters.
The father smelt rats, for he'd often caught flats,
A prowling about his quarters;
So packed up snug, in a sort of stone jug,
Were these purty little Flatcatcher's Darters.
Singing, Doodle dee, doodle dum,
Didum doodle da.
Chorus, Ladies—Doodle dee, &c.
But Cupid is a downy cove,
Wot it takes a deal to hinder;
And if you shuts him out o' the door,
Vy he valks in at the winder.
So one day there came a poor old dame,
Who all in rags and tatters,
By an artful dodge, got into the lodge
Of these purty little Flatcatcher's Darters.
Singing, Doodle dee, &c.
Wot it takes a deal to hinder;
And if you shuts him out o' the door,
Vy he valks in at the winder.
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Who all in rags and tatters,
By an artful dodge, got into the lodge
Of these purty little Flatcatcher's Darters.
Singing, Doodle dee, &c.
Now I have heard since, that a rich young prince,
Who had come from a foreign land, O,
Laid a wager that he, out of one of the three,
Would inveigle her lily-white hand, O.
So in this disguise, he flung dust in the eyes,
Of the girls wot he was arter;
And like a sly fox, spite of bolts, bars, and locks,
Bolted off with one purty little Darter.
Singing, Doodle dee, &c.
Who had come from a foreign land, O,
Laid a wager that he, out of one of the three,
Would inveigle her lily-white hand, O.
So in this disguise, he flung dust in the eyes,
Of the girls wot he was arter;
And like a sly fox, spite of bolts, bars, and locks,
Bolted off with one purty little Darter.
Singing, Doodle dee, &c.
Rich.
In plain prose, I'm the hero of the story,
And thus fling off the mask, like gay Count Ory.
Music—Richcraft throws off his old woman's disguise— Babillarda screams and rushes off, followed by Finetta— Idelfonza, who has gone to sleep during the song, is aroused by the scream, starts up, and is about to follow, but Richcraft intercepts her.
Rich.
Fly not, sweet princess!
Idel.
I don't want to fly;
It's so much trouble, but perforce must try.
Rich.
Wherefore?
Idel.
Because 'twould be great impropriety,
For me to stay alone in your society.
Rich.
Oh, say not so! For you alone I came,
For you alone I've played this desperate game!
You are alone the prize I have in view.
Idel.
Leave me alone, then—and be quiet, do.
Rich.
Not till my passion moves you to compassion.
Idel.
It bores me to be moved in any fashion—
Besides, how can you talk such trash to me?
It was my sister you came here to see.
Rich.
What, Babillarda! That eternal chatterer,
Who, to call magpie, would but too much flatter her!
No; 'tis the sloe black of those sleepy eyes!
'Tis Idelfonza that I idolise!
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That laps me in Elysium! Matchless fair,
I am a Prince—of money I have plenty,
And love, like you, the “dolce fa niente.”
Of slaves you will possess a countless band,
Besides your humble servant, to command.
And you shall sit as long as daylight lingers,
Twiddling, in graceful ease, those fairy fingers.
And you shall have not only naught to do,
But your own time to do it in!
Idel.
'Tis true
You talk this well!
Rich.
By Heaven, I'll do this, lady!
Say but to marry me that you are ready—
I've lords in waiting, who in ambush tarry,
To carry you off, if my point I carry.
Idel.
Somebody must, for I will ne'er be married
Unless to church, at any rate, I'm carried.
Rich.
You shall be, in a litter!
Idel.
Really! Shall I!
You don't mean what you say?
Rich.
Yes! Liter-ally.
Idel.
Well, I suppose I ought to ask papa.
Rich.
But then your father's gone so very far,
And never may come back again, I'm told,
And by that time we should be both so old.
Idel.
Well, you may take my hand, then.
Rich.
Rapture! thus,
Upon my road to bliss, I take a buss!
(Music—As he kisses her, the Glass Distaff she carries at her girdle flies into pieces.)
Idel.
Ah! There's my distaff, now, gone all to shatters?
Rich.
(aside)
That's number two! (aloud)
Well, dearest, and what matters?
Idel.
Not much, I grant, for I should never use it.
Rich.
(aside)
Now for the third! Time flies! I mustn't lose it!
(aloud)
The sun is going down, and so must I,
To call my friends up—off with you to hie!
Rest in this bower till 'tis time to start.
Idel.
Oh, I'll rest anywhere with all my heart.
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He really is a charming little man!
(goes into alcove)
Rich.
(quickly shutting the door and locking it)
I have caught you, now catch me if you can!
Song—Richcraft—Air, “Like the lightning.”
Like the lightning, or as slick as grease,
I fly to conquests grander,
And, please the pigs, I'll cook the geese
Of all the race of Gander!
I'm aware that time is fleeting,
But I can't avoid repeating,
That like lightning, or as slick as grease, &c., &c.
(Exit Richcraft)
I fly to conquests grander,
And, please the pigs, I'll cook the geese
Of all the race of Gander!
I'm aware that time is fleeting,
But I can't avoid repeating,
That like lightning, or as slick as grease, &c., &c.
(Exit Richcraft)
| The Discreet Princess ; or, the Three Glass Distaffs | |