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Soft Musick.
The Scene drawn, discovers the wishing Chair.
Enter a Boy in a Surplice dancing, follow'd by two women bearing a Chaffing dish between them, and smoaking Tobacco; after them comes the Chief Priest in a Fools-coat, his Train supported by two in like habit, two Priests in Surplices follow them; then come two Judges playing on Jewes-trumps followed by a Cardinal, playing on a Childs Fiddle; two in grave habits follow him playing on Childrens Pipes; then comes a Major beating a little Drum; after him the King leading None-so-fair. Prince Nick and Sweet-lips, Phillip and

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Woudha. attended—with Guards &c. They pass round the Stage, and place themselves on each side, and the Chief Priests before the Chair, and the two in Surplices on each side.
Song.
Let Maudlin lovers that are in despair,
And musty Virgins at their latest Pray'r.
To be freed from their troubles, come hither.
And Widows, whose fires
Of unnatr'all desires.
Have parch'd up their faces like leather.
Chorus.
We'l dry up their tears, and ease all their Care,
With a delicate thing called a new wishing chair.
Of crackling tell-tale Wicker 'tis not made;
Which loves dear Secrets has too oft' betray'd.
To this Chair so much Vertue is given.
That when you are in
At the turning a pin,
You will think you are going to Heaven.
Chorus.
We'l &c.
With offerings laden, to the chair make hast,
Before the precious time of wishing's past.
For when once the kind Engine is falling,
You must bear your pain,
Till the time come again
Though you rend the moist Clouds with your bawling.
Chorus.
We'l dry up your tears. &c.

The Priests bow, and mutter to the Chair; then turn to the People.

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Song.
Son of Latrona thou great rogue,
Here's None-so-fair her grief to disimbogue.
The Jade is skittish, full of treachery
But wilful rude, and loath to try.
Chorus.
Loe here's the Fool King Andrew too,
Let's cheat them firmly er'they go.
Let's cheat, &c.—

Chief Priest.
—The Sacred Chair vouchsafes that all
Upon all four should to him fall.

All fall on their hands.
Chair.
Hoh, hoh, hoh, hoe, hoe, hoe:

Ch. P.
—Your offerings are accepted, stand by my Cronies,
Till we have finished all the Ceremonies.

Chair
roars.
Ha! the mystick Chair begins to frown,
All that have wealth, must lay it down.
Keep nought of Pride, or Riches near you,
Least Chair in wrath to pieces tear you.

They all lay down their Money, Swords, &c. which the Priests gather up.
Song by the two Priests.
1. Pr.
Thou pickst the Butchers knife out of his mouth,
Thou robst a poor old woman of her tooth.

2. Pr.
—Thou didst the monstrous Flesh-flies to destroy,
Who bred the Maggots which did Beef o're run.


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Chorus.
Thou sly, and bauling Theif go on with joy,
Their Money, Swords, and Hats are all our own.
A Dance by the two Priests.
Song.
1. Pr.
By Germain Princess that notorious cheat.

2. Pr.
By Cressets memory we thee intreat,
Thou wouldst with noise, and show blind all their eyes.

1. Pr.
Least they our silly Opera despise,

Chorus of both.
—Least they our silly Opera despice.

Chorus.
Now Croudy mutton is come out of France,
Tom thimble has made show compleat,
Jewes-Trumps, and Cymbals sound, and let us dance,
Since Wool' is small, let cry be great.
A Dance.
The Invocation.
2. Pr.
—James Naylor, Pope Joan, Wat. Tyler, Mall. Cutpurs, Chocorelly.

All.
Answer.
—Help our Opera, because 'tis very silly.

2. Pr.
—Massaniello, Mosely, Jack-straw, Jantredisco, Pimponelli.

Ans.
—Help our Opera, because 'tis very silly.

2. Pr.
—Hocus-pocus, Don-Quixot, Jack Adams, Mary
Ambry, Frier Pungy.
William Lilly—

Ans.
Help our Opera, because 'tis very silly.

2. Pr.
Carpentero, Paintero, Dancero, Musickero, Songstero, Punchanelly.

Ans.
Help our Opera, because 'tis very silly.


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Chorus first Sung, and then Sung, and Danc'd to.
Some shall hollow, some Dance and Sing,
Hey ding, ding, ding, hey ding, ding,
Omn'a bene—Omn'a bene.
Ding, ding, ding, with hey ding, ding ding,
With hey, &c.—

The Chief Priests seats None-so-fair in the Chair, it Thunders and Lightens; the Chair sinks, and in its place a dreadful shape arises, and sayes.—
The Princess to the Chair is pleasing,
And all her troubles now are easing.

The Chief Priest turns over his head, and the other two Priests take the little Boy in the Surplice, and whip him while they Sing this.
He took him by the Lilly Frock,
And scourged him full sore;
A long half hour by the Clock,
Alack a day therefore,
While Youth doth last, the changes Ring,
With a ding dong, ding dong ding,
When Youth is flown, and Age is come,
The Clappers down, the Bell doth groan:
And call you to a sad long home,
With a heavy, heavy, heavy boam, boam.

The Chief Priest rises and waves his Wand thrice.
Ch. Pr.
Comorah whee, Comorah whee, Comorah whee.

All
answer bowing.
Shoolimocroh, Shoolimocroh, Shoolimocroh.

Ch. Pr.
—Kiss Betty.

All
answ. bowing.
—Polly kagathoy.—


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It Thunders and Lightens, the Priest waves his Wand, all squat down—the dreadfull shape sincks, and the Chair rises kissing None-so-fair,—and she immediately comes out of it.
Ch. Pr.
Behold the Chair.—

[All rise up hastily and bow.
Ch. Pr.
Now None-so-fair, has had her wish,
And first you shall hear what it is;
And after we will sacrifice a—Fish.

K. And.
Oh Sir! we humbly do beseech
To know who shall her Husband be,
For that our very Ears do itch;
And if you please we fain would see.

It Thunders and Lightens extreamly, and then the Chair delivers this Oracle.—
Lead None-so-fair to yonder Wood,
Where Lovers howle like Beasts for Food,
There she must sigh, and weep a good.
And so you there must leave her,
For the White Bear of Norwich must have her.
To her he will be very Civil,
Be gone, 'tis vain to huff or snivil.

K. And.
O fie, O fie, O laud, O me forlorn,
Would I had dy'd e'r I was born;
I have spent my Youth fair,
To get a wife for a Bear.

Woud.

Lippy, I could leap out of my skin for joy Mother
Woossat, a brave Beldam! she has keep'd her word.


Sweet.

Nothing vexes me, but that I must be Aunt to her
litter of Cubs.—We shall have roaring Nephews.—


K. And.
Troop, troop, if I keep in this dreadful mind,
I will come back, but I'le leave my life behind.

Nick.
Hold, hold, King Andrew stay, be wise I say,
And don't the Gods obey;
If 'twere good that None-so-fair were given to the Bear,
You should hear'd on't before y' had known't.


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Phil.

But if 'tis bad, then 'tis not good, we know what's
what.

We must not shed the guiltless blood,
Yet None-so-fair, poor Sheep must go to pot.
Gods, you wou'd be veaz'd, wo'r you z'ard in your kind,
Vor y'are never half an hour in a mind.

Nick.

King be not cheated nor cullied King; I'le be hang'd
if there is not a live thing in the wishing Chair, didn't you
see how None-so-fair was tickl'd, did not she spin like a
Top, and stand upon her head like a Juggler; 'tis a damn'd
Son of a Whore Chair, and he lyes, and I am not satisfi'd.—


Pr.
Oh Sir, take heed for Crimes like this,
The Sacred Chair has Rods in piss.

K. And.
When wishing Chair his Silence broak,
I do believe Tom-tumbler spoak.

Pr.

The wonders of our wishing Chair, prov'd by Miracle,
and that shews the truth of the power of the wonder.


Nick.

The Power is governed by the Order, which commands
the Power and the Order, Rules the Beauty which
governs the Order, which is found ty'd fast to the end of
the Creation, in a long round Chain; and things, and things
loose fast upon one another, I don't know howish, like
bunches of Paper at a Kites tail, and so by a plain orderly
method of Power and Order, and Order, without Power,
and Power without Order; and no Power, and no Order,
and no Order, but a kind of Dis-orderly Powerful Order.

The fixed World is drawn, confin'd at large;
As men in Ropes ty'd loose, tugg Western Barge.

Ch. Pr.
You and your Nature are meer Ignorance,
But we appear to wise foreseeing chance.

Nick.

If Nature is less then Miracle, when Heaven uses
Supernatural Miracle; the Gods declare their Power less,
bycause Miracle is greater then Nature;—But if the Gods
make children, when Natures Instrument is out of tune:
They use no Nature, because Nature without Nature; is
not Nature, but Miracle Unnatural, miraculous Nature.


Phil.

There's your Anchovies; Priest—'twas woundy
well spoak, and zooe if this be granted; The Gods can, but


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they wo'not; because they would, but they cannot, and
they wo'nt, and they cannot, and they cannot, any they
wo'nt, and zo.

They'l ne'r be mad, because they'r not long in a mind,
Az a deaf Hostess can't zee, because she's blind.

Ch. Pr.
Avaunt you scoffing Blades, avaunt,
The Thundring Gods begin to Rant.

It Thunders, and Lightens, the Chair sinks, and the Priests, and all their Attendants run off the Stage.
Phil.

What dost think, we be wild Irish; and will run
away,

Because the Clouds be troubl'd with the wind cholick,
Odzbboars dost think chill, lose my Coin, and my Parcel?

Non.
The Gods and wishing Chair, we must obey,
And I will go, because I cannot stay.

K. And.
—Come my sweet Pigs-nie let's make hast,
If Bear eats thee for his breakfast:
As I'am a sinner. He shall have me for a dinner.

Nick.
Thus great—was betray'd,
And Psyche taken from her Dad,
Though Princess huff'd, and swore like mad.

Exeunt all but Phillip.
Phil.
—All gwon, zure 'tis a Bawdy-house,
Vor there cham twoald they use you thus,
Be vengeance cranck, till you are snoring drunk,
And then away shirks Money, Cloaths, and Punck.
The Gods may well rain Golden showr's,
Into the Laps of Paramours:
Credit is theirs, but cost is ours;
Ch'ave not one penny left my drouth to quench,
If this be Religion; give me a Wench. Ther's your Anchovles.
Exit Phillip.