University of Virginia Library

CANTO V.

Oberon the Fairy King,
And Mab his Queen, that pretty thing;
Peppercorn, Sir Pigwiggin too,
Those Doughty Knights of the Old Shoe;
Pigmies low, and Giants Tall,
These must Answer to our Call,
And they do to us resort,
To Dance and Sing, and make us sport.
Polyphemus, Hogmagog,
Play before us at Leap-Frog;
Blind Homer, and the merry Greek,
At Hide and Seek will make us squeek.
Brontes and Steropes with brawny Arms,
Hammer Jove's Bolts and Mars his Arms;
Bacchus and Silenus Drunk,
With Vulcan and Venus his Punck.
Thief Mercury shall cut a Purse;
Crafty Ulysses shall do worse.

18

Helena, stoln by Paris bold,
Shall wrong dispose the Pome of Gold.
Ganymed, Cupid, parlous Boys
For Kissing, and all other Toys.
We have our Masques, and Mid-night Revels,
Till we be all as drunk as Devils.
Our Musick is harmonious Notes,
Crowding from our hoarser Throats:
Cats, Scriech Owls, Wolves, Dogs, Bulls and Bears,
In Consort please our skilful Ears:
Such dismal howling, yelling, crying,
Revives us, though we lay a dying.
All the Devils flock about us;
But they can do nothing without us.
Diogenes is in his Tub,
Hercules brandishes his Club;
Sardanapalus, step but in,
Amongst the Maids you'l see them Spin.
Bellisarios poor and blind,
Give him a Farthing, be so kind;
Remember Alexander too,
And bury him, having less to do.
Cæsar and Pompey may do well;
But you'l not hear them nam'd in Hell.
They had a Fame, but it is gone,
Ask the Ghosts, they hear of none.
They that frighted the World so wide,
In Coblars Stalls below do hide.
Overgrown Thieves and Murtherers high,
Buried now in Obscurity.

19

One Rare sight more, open your Eyes,
There's Domitian catching Flies.
See Bloody Nero, how he struts,
And kicks Poppæa on the Guts:
He Sings and Fiddles, at the sight
Of no less Flames than Romes, by Night;
Disguis'd in habit of a Swain,
Handsomly basted for his pain.
The Devil was in him; for they say,
He ript his Dam up, saw where he lay.
Sejanus was a Rogue, and Cateline,
Against their Country to combine.
Sylla and Marius did proscribe
The richest Gulls of every Tribe.
Brutus and Cassius stab'd a Commander,
As great as e're was Alexander.
Cleopatra's doting Fool
Mark Antony, send them to School,
With Lepidus; let Octavius whip'um,
For to the Throne he did out-skip'um.
Come Satyrs, swinge your Whips of Steel,
We'l help you slash, and make'um feel.
A Generation of Knaves,
For sending Innocents to their Graves.
Xerxes, how shamefully he crows
Over the Waves, and gives them blows
And Fetters too, to keep them in awe,
For breaking his Bridge, indeed Law.
A Famous Duke, with Pompous Train,
With a rich Ring Marries the Main.
From Brittish Shoars another swells,
And triumphs brave with Cockle-shells.

20

Cuckold Claudius, Messaline
Is every Varlets, more than thine.
Before thy Face married thy Slave,
And led the Bride-groom to his Grave.
Another thinks he did much braver,
In doing his Horse that mighty Favour,
To make him Consul, not to fear danger,
Gave him to boot a Golden Manger.
One feeds his Lampries, fresh and fresh,
With fattest gobs of slavish Flesh;
For a Glass broke, or Porridge spilt,
Runs his Dagger up to the Hilt.
He that shines in Diadems,
Drinks the Dust of Pearl and Gems,
In Crystal Cups; 'Tis costly Art,
For a Cordial next his Heart.
Heliogabalus, the Gormandizer,
Caracalla the Bloody Miser;
Dionysius, that Tyrant Devil,
Tiberius, Author of all Evil;
Romulus, Tarquin, Villains bold,
The Plague of Mortals, young and old:
Monsters of Men, the Shame of Crowns;
The Sword's an Enemy to Gowns.
One cuts Mount Athos in two pieces,
The Wiser gets the Golden Fleeces.
Don Quixots Red-Cross-Man in Steel,
Takes chanted Castles, makes Giants reel;
Relieves all poor distressed Ladies,
And I'le assure you does it Gratis.
George kill'd the Dragon, sav'd the Maid,
E're since Knights-Errant are decay'd.

21

O poor Tantalus, O poor Ixion,
O poor Prometheus, in hard Iron;
O poor Danaides, all the Fry
Of miserable Wretches, Come and try
What we can do, when all Helps fail,
If the Head can't save you, try the Tail.
Will you always lie a dying,
Like Fools, howling and crying?
We see the World all in a Glass,
What manner of Man Adam was.
All the mad Pranks that have been plaid,
Since the Foundation was laid;
We have Patterns fit for every Work,
From the Jew to the Great Turk.
Come then to us, for we can tell
Of all the Rogueries in Hell.
These and a Thousand more brave Sights,
Are represented for Delights.
Thus we battle in our Grease,
And Frolick in what Games we please.
We have our merry Bouts, our Jovial Bowzings,
Our Junckets and our large Carowzings;
Pampring our Genius, while we may,
With Nectar and Ambrosia.
We Devils Birds thus stufft and cram'd,
Our End is to be hang'd and damn'd.