The songs of Joseph Mather

When timber-legg'd Harry crook'd Jenny did marry,
They were not at all apprehensive of blows;
Three ragmen did quarrel about their apparel,
Which often had frightened both small birds and crows.
This resolute prial fought on battle royal,
While Jenny spoke thus, with hump back and sharp shins:
“Be loving as brothers, we'll chant for some others,
And you shall take ours for some needles and pins.”

The bridesmaid, full-breasted, both vowed and protested
She never saw men at a wedding so rude;
Old Grace with her matches, quite full of her catches,
Swore she would be tipsy ere they did conclude.
The supper being ended, they each condescended
With wholesome hot liquor to fill up their skins;
Jack Tar in his jacket, who sat by Doll's placket,
Swore he would drink nothing but grog and clear gin.

Blind Ralph, with his fiddle, was placed in the middle,
Who had not been shaved since the second of June;
Young Sandy the piper told Moll he would stripe her
If she would not dance now his pipe was in tune.
They played them such touches that wood legs and crutches,
And rag-pokes and matches and songs flew about:
Blind Ralph being a stranger, his trap was in danger.
So he tenderly begged that they would give it out.

Then Ralph was intreated in state to be seated,
Upon an old cupboard the landlord had got;
Like madmen enchanted they tippled and ranted
'Till down came the fiddler as if he'd been shot;
They drank gin by noggins, and small beer by flagons,
Till each had sufficiently loosen'd his hide,
Then all who were able retired to the stable,
And slept with their nose in each others backside.

University of Virginia Library

Song VIII. TIMBER-LEGG'D HARRY.