The Probationary Odes of Jonathan Pindar, Esq A cousin of Peter's, and candidate for the post of Poet Laureat to the C. U. S. In two parts |
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ODE VIII.
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 | The Probationary Odes of Jonathan Pindar, Esq |  |
ODE VIII.
TO NEUTRALITY.
Jonathan rehearseth the advantages of Neutrality.
Neutrality, thou vile Heteroclite,
Uncertain in thy gender as thy face is;
A dastard, squeaking, base hermaphrodite,
Whom manhood to a monster but debases.
Uncertain in thy gender as thy face is;
A dastard, squeaking, base hermaphrodite,
Whom manhood to a monster but debases.
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Whom neither sex will own, and both despise,
For favors suing both, alike in vain,
To whom the gifts of Nature just suffice,
To double all thy wants, and their disdain.
For favors suing both, alike in vain,
To whom the gifts of Nature just suffice,
To double all thy wants, and their disdain.
Who, like an eunuch in seraglio bred,
Art kick'd and cuff'd by those thou caterest for,
Still doom'd to bow thine abject, servile head,
To those whom most thine impotence abhor.
Art kick'd and cuff'd by those thou caterest for,
Still doom'd to bow thine abject, servile head,
To those whom most thine impotence abhor.
Who like a truant-boy with bum well fraught
With stripes that mark him for no common dunce;
Or, like a thief, that's in the mainer caught,
Art rifled, strip'd and whip'd or hang'd at once.
With stripes that mark him for no common dunce;
Or, like a thief, that's in the mainer caught,
Art rifled, strip'd and whip'd or hang'd at once.
Or like a capon, that's with nettles stung,
To make him softer chickens not his own,
Which, nurs'd and shelter'd by him whilst they're young,
Are sure to peck, and beat him when they 're grown.
To make him softer chickens not his own,
Which, nurs'd and shelter'd by him whilst they're young,
Are sure to peck, and beat him when they 're grown.
Thy puny form put off, and dare assume
Herculean limbs, and nerves, and strength, and might,
So may the Gods reverse thy hateful doom,
And thy dim stars reflect a lustre bright.
Herculean limbs, and nerves, and strength, and might,
So may the Gods reverse thy hateful doom,
And thy dim stars reflect a lustre bright.
| The Probationary Odes of Jonathan Pindar, Esq | |