University of Virginia Library

Blind Justice

Mr. Flynhy is spending the duration
of his stay at a downtown
hotel, where he is rumored to be
establishing a houseboy's union to
report on underground smoking
activities. Mr. Flynhy, when questioned
of his work, said "What, me
worry?"

For those afraid of detection,
Mr. Flynhy may be identified by
the seeing eye dog he usually accompanies,
carrying 27 8 by 10
glossy print photos with circles
and arrows and a paragraph on
the back of each one.

Cecil Speed—Mr. Speed is probably
the top-ranked narc ever to
come to Charlottesville. The balding,
kindly former head of the
Nottingham County bureau has led
raids in all regions of the country.
His most famous exploit was probably
the peyote raid conducted
many moons ago against various
Indian tribes in Arizona and New
Mexico.

Mr. Speed is known as a fast
man with a search warrant; having
gotten power-of-attorney from a
local judge, he often fills them out
himself. No one should be deceived
by this supernarc's benign appearance,
for he has sent over two dozen
heads up the river in the last year
alone.