University of Virginia Library

Flick Talk

DC Movie Awards

By Head Freblich
Daily Cavalier Filmfreak

Invariably, almost every winner
of an academy award gives his
thanks to "all the little people,"
and also thanks the whole motion
picture industry for making it
possible. But while all the big boys
get the credit, the little people of
the film media go for the most part
unnoticed.

The Motion Picture Academy
can only give so many awards, and
so have to concentrate on the major
categories: best actor, best song,
etc. But that is still no excuse for
not honoring all those who function
in what seems to be minor
roles, but are really very important.

What follows is a list of several
categories unrecognized by the
Academy, and nominees in each
division. We leave the picking of the
winners up to you so no one will be
slighted.

Category One: Best performance
by a non-human - the bear in
"King of the Grizzlies," the horses
in "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance
Kid," the falcon in "Anne of
the Thousand Days," the lizard in
"Valley of the Iguana," the computer
in "The Computer Wore
Tennis Shoes," the NBC peacock,
the seagull in "Last Summer,"
Herby in "The Love Bug."

Category Two: Best Skin Flick,
foreign or home made - "Libertine,"
"Candy," "Fanny Hill," "I A
Woman Part Two," "Caged Desires,"
and "Mondo Obscenity."

Category Three: Best Preview -
see category two.

Category Four: Least Redeeming
Social Value - see category
three plus "All The Loving
Couples," "Seventeen," "The Computer
Wore Tennis Shoes."

Category Five: Best Portrayal of
American Ideals - "Putney
Swope," "The Computer Wore
Tennis Shoes," "True Grit," "The
Love Bug," and "Z."

Category Six: Best Late Show
Movie - "Beach Blanket Bingo," "I
Was A Communist For The FBI,"
"Prisoner of Zenda," "Gidget Goes
Hungarian," and "Attack of the
Puppet People."

Category Seven: Nominees Who
Deserved Best Actor More Than
John Wayne: Dustin Hoffman,
John Voight, Richard Burton, and
Spiro Agnew.

So there, film viewing public.
Here's your chance to honor the
things that really count in the
movie industry. If we've missed any
of your favorites that's too bad, the
Academy probably missed them
too.