| | 1 | Author: | Rowson
Mrs.
1762-1824 | Add | | | Title: | Sarah  | | | | Published: | 1997 | | | | Subjects: | University of Virginia Library, Text collection | UVA-LIB-Text | University of Virginia Library, Early American Fiction, 1789-1875 | UVA-LIB-EarlyAmFict1789-1875 | | | | Description: | YES! Anne, the die is cast—I am a wife. But
a less cheerful bride, one who looks forward
with less hope, perhaps never existed. You
were surprised, you say, to hear to whom I had
relinquished my hand and heart—leave out the
latter, Anne, it had nothing to do with the transaction.
Why were you not here, you say, to
have prevented a union which you are morally
certain will not conduce to my happiness? You
cannot be more certain of it, than I am; but
what could I do? Frederic gone to India; hemmed
round with persuasive meddlers, who, I am
more than half convinced, urged me to this
measure, fearful I should be burthensome to
them; and I was also told it was necessary
for the preservation of my reputation that I
should accept Darnley. I had no natural protector;
my father so far distant he was the same
as dead to me; Frederic gone; my health not
sufficiently established to enable me to undertake
the journey I meditated before you left England;
my finances reduced to a very small portion, and
though most earnestly entreated to forbear,
Darnley continuing his visits. I found I must
accede to his proposals, or be thrown on the
world, censured by my relations, robbed of my
good name, and being poor, open to the pursuits
and insults of the profligate. One thing which
encouraged me to hope I might be tolerably happy
in the union was—though my heart felt no
strong emotions in his favor, it was totally free
from all partiality towards any other. He always
appeared good humored and obliging; and though
his mind was not highly cultivated, I thought
time might improve him in that particular. However,
I was candid with him; told him the situation
of my heart, and asked if he could be content
with receiving attentions which would be
only the result of principle. He seemed to
think this only maidenish affectation, and perfectly
convinced within himself that I loved him
already. “Madam, a personal interview is not sought
from any expected pleasure it may afford, but because
I think it necessary to speak a few words
to you. I must insist on seeing you; if you cannot
come down, I will come to you. “It is certainly painful to me, Mr. Darnley,
to find you voluntarily avoid my society. Perhaps
I can divine the cause, and by removing it
the effect may happily cease. You think my
sex and situation will lead me, when we meet,
to recapitulate some late events, and make disagreeable
remarks thereon. Such a recapitulation
is by no means necessary. Let us meet as
though no such events had ever taken place:
let the whole pass into eternal oblivion: trust
4*
me, it shall not be my fault if it does not. I hope
you will dine at home to day; Anne is engaged,
and if you should dine out also, I shall dine
alone. “You are very much mistaken, Mrs. Darnley,
if you suppose I dread your reproaches: I
know, with all your boasted forbearance, you
dare not utter any, or it is not your regard to
me would prevent you; but pray understand,
madam, if I am not master of my own house, I
am of my actions and person, and shall go out
when and where I please, without consulting
your pleasure; mind your own business, and
don't trouble yourself about me; you have got a
comfortable home, and may go out or come in,
as you please. But you cannot suppose, after
the very polite method which you took to turn
Jessey out of doors, that I can see you with any
degree of temper; and since you have withdrawn
from her your protection, I feel doubly
bound to afford her mine. She is a woman whom
I esteem; she loves me with her whole soul;
she has given incontestable proofs, that her affection
for me supersedes all other considerations;
and had she sooner been freed from her matrimonial
shackles, you would never have been
the wife of “That I am your wife, Mr. Darnley, is more
my misfortune, than my fault. But you are under
a mistake, in supposing Jessey loves you.
No woman can be under the influence of that
sacred passion, (whose power I can conceive,
though as yet I have never felt its influence) who
degrades herself below even the pity of a man of
principle, and for self gratification plunges the object
of her pretended adoration into infamy, by
inciting him to repeated breaches of every sacred
and moral obligation. You say I have a comfortable
home; can that home be so, from
whence domestic peace is banished? You are
your own master—It is well you are so. Would
to God I was as free. I AM exceedingly concerned, my dear Mrs.
Darnley, at the little brulee which has taken
place between my mother and yourself, especially
as she tells me you talk of leaving her; this I
lament, because I think Caroline very much improved
since you have had the entire management
of her; not but that it has been a matter
of surprise to me, that a woman so young, lovely,
and accomplished as yourself, should voluntarily
submit to the humiliation of being subject
to the humor and caprices of any one, and live
in a state of dependence, when they might command
affluence on the very easy terms of sharing
it with an agreeable man, who would think himself
honored by her acceptance of his protection:
and this I know to be your case. The marquis
of H—, who is an intimate friend of lord
Linden's, and whom you have seen at my house
and at my mother's, has often expressed his
fervent admiration of your person, manners and
accomplishments. He was present when my
mother told us of your quarrel; I do assure you
he took your part very highly, called you a
persecuted angel; raved at my mother, and
was setting off post haste, to offer you consolation,
in the form of a young handsome lover and
a settlement; but I stopped him, told him he
must conduct himself with prudence and delicacy,
if he wished to succeed with you—so while he is
writing his amorous epistle, I have scrawled
these hasty lines, to intreat you to give his proposal
a fair perusal, and take it into serious consideration.
Only reflect, my dear, on the
unprotected state, in which you now are, in a
strange place, without friends or money. You will
perhaps say, you have reputation; but, child,
will reputation pay your lodging, or buy you a
new gown when you want one? No, believe me,
poor reputation is many a time left naked in the
street, while those who have disclaimed and
turned her out of doors, are sumptuously clothed,
inhabit palaces, and ride in splendid equipages.
But I will say no more; your own good sense
will direct you; and surely I think you cannot be
so wilfully blind to your own interest, as to refuse
the offers of the marquis. Do, child, be wise for
once, and take the advice of a friend, though I
am arguing against myself to persuade you to do
so. But if you are romantic enough to prefer
dependence; why, if you must leave ma, come
and live with me, and I will take Caroline home;
at any rate, pray do not, in a flight of elevation,
run from those evils which you know, to those of
which at present you can have no conception. THOUGH I have but a few times enjoyed the
pleasure of being in your company, those few
have been enough to awaken in my mind sentiments
of the highest esteem for your talents
and virtues. I have understood from my friend,
lord Linden, that you have connected yourself in
marriage, with a man who knows not how justly
to appreciate your worth; and who has permitted
you to come unprovided and unprotected into
this country, that by the exertion of your abilities,
you may obtain means of subsistence; this,
madam, being the case, prevents my having the
honor of laying myself and fortune at your feet.
But as from the treatment you have experienced
from your husband, every tie must be broken
between you, every obligation dissolved—permit
me to offer you protection and independence;
allow me to hope to be admitted among the
chosen few, whom you may honor with esteem.
I have a neat house, ready for your reception, a
few miles from Dublin, whether you can retire,
until one can be prepared in the city, should you
prefer residing there; a carriage and servants
shall attend your order, free of expense, and a
settlement of five hundred pounds a year during
your life, awaits your acceptance; only allow me
the privilege of passing some hours of every
day in your society, and by studying your
charmingly intelligent countenance, discover and
prevent your wishes, before you have time to
give them utterance. I have desired the person
who brings you this, not to wait for an answer.
I will not hurry your gentle and delicate nature;
take your own time to consider my proposals;
only to give me one comforting gleam of hope,
allow me to see you for five minutes this evening,
at Mrs. Bellamy's; I will call about nine
o'clock; I will not say one word on the subject
of this letter; my visit shall be confined to the
period mentioned; if it is your wish, only receive
me without a frown, and I will live in the hope, that
my future visits (when you are settled in your
own house) will be welcomed with a smile. I
am, madam, with the utmost respect, your sincere
adorer, IN pursuance of your advice, I sought out
Mrs. Bellamy, and waited on her to inquire
after Mrs. Darnley, who I perceived, by your
letter, was a person in whose fate either yourself,
or some of your friends, were particularly
interested. When I discovered who this Mrs.
Bellamy was, I will confess I was surprised how
you could be any way engaged in an inquiry after
a woman who had resided in her family; as
she is the mother of the celebrated Mrs. O'Donnell,
who has alienated the affection of the
(otherwise) worthy lord Linden, from his amiable
lady and her lovely children; and this
Mrs. Bellamy was always supposed to be the
vile agent who instigated the daughter to attempt
to ensnare, and whose counsel afterwards assisted
her to bind fast, the fetters which hold his lordship
in his unworthy bondage. However, I presumed
you had some very good reason for desiring
me to be particular in my inquiry, and I set
in earnest about it. The old gentlewoman received
me with politeness, regretted that it was
not in her power to give me the desired information
where Mrs. Darnley was to be found; said
she had been much deceived in her; that she had
brought her from England with her, to superintend
the education of her grand-daughter; but
that very soon after their arrival in Dublin,
she, Mrs. Darnley, made acquaintance with
some low people in the neighborhood; and
one day when she was out, she had taken her
trunk and gone off, without leaving any message
whatever; and that she imagined she was gone
with a kind of sailor-looking man, who used frequently
to come after her. While she was
speaking, a servant came in to bring a note; of
whom she inquired whether any of the people
below had heard or seen any thing of Darnley,
since she went away? The young woman replied,
that Mrs. O'Donnell's John had said, he
saw her a few days since go into a house in an
alley at the lower end of the town. `It is no
great matter where she is,' replied Mrs. Bellamy,
`for what is she good for? She imposed
on me, when she applied for employment, by
telling an artful tale of her husband's misfortunes;
said necessity had obliged her to separate herself
from him; but I rather think, from what
I have since heard, that he had good reasons for
separating from her.' After this intelligence,
my good sir, you may be sure I felt no very
great curiosity to hear any more about your fair
adventurer; but as you had expressed so ardent
a desire for information, I took down the name
of the alley where the woman said she had been
seen, and went immediately there; inquired at
every house where I thought it was likely I
might find her, describing her person according
to the description given in your letter; I had
almost given up all hope, when going into a house
that stood a little more back than the rest, I
found she was known to the mistress of it, and
had lived there several weeks. THE trouble I am about to give your lordship
may, perhaps, be deemed an impertinent
intrusion; and an apologizing introduction, might
by some, be thought indispensible; but I trust
your lordship will admit the cause, when I have
explained it, of itself a sufficient excuse for the
liberty I take, without my offering any other. I WAS honored with your favor of July 17,
and feel myself impelled to admire a friendship
so ardent and sincere, as that which you profess
to feel for the charming Mrs. Darnley. You
were right in your conjecture, that I should
make instant inquiry after the lovely fugitive,
who had taken such alarm at my letter, and fled
from what she termed my persecution. In that
letter, I told her I would see her in the evening;
and at the hour I had appointed, I repaired to
Mrs. Bellamy's house. Judge of my surprize at
hearing she was gone, and had taken her trunks
with her, leaving no message I inquired how
she was conveyed from the house; and learning
that she went in a hackney coach, on my return
home, I employed one of my servants to
inquire at the stands around, for the man who
had taken up a fare at such an hour, in such a
street—by this man I discovered where he had
taken her, and went in the evening of the following
day, to the lane where he directed me;
intending, if I could not prevail on your fair
friend to favor my suit, to insist upon being her
banker, and serve her even against her will. “THOUGH Lady Bourke has not the pleasure
of a personal acquaintance with Mrs. Darnley,
she knows and respects her character; she
begs Mrs. D. to consider the furniture, &c.
which she will find at Woodland Cottage, as her
own; and use it as such, as long as the situation
Mr. Darnley holds, may render a residence
there agreeable. Lady B. hopes Mrs. D.
will find every accommodation, and enjoy much
happiness in her new habitation.” | | | Similar Items: | Find |
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